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0|0|0|||1||Baseball at Safeco|Bad Moon||07:47:31|06/25/2003|[updated:LAST EDITED ON 06-25-03 AT 07:51 AM (EDT)]I recently went to a Seattle Mariners ballgame at the still semi-new Safeco Field.  I hadn%92t been to a game since the Kingdom was blown up%2C so I was stoked to check out the new stadium.  A renewed interest in baseball coupled with Father%92s Day gave me the excuse to go.  After watching the M%92s game last night %28take THAT Anaheim%21%29%2C I decided to write my impressions of the game and the field for no reason other than I felt like writing about baseball.  Yeah%2C I%92m about three years late%2C but Mom always said I was a late bloomer so what are you gonna do%3F %0D%0A%0D%0AThe Name%3A I%92ve always hated the name.  When I first heard it I thought it was the dumbest name for a ballpark ever %28this was before MinuteMaid Field%2C or whatever its called%29%2C and my opinion has not changed.  Sure%2C letting companies name fields because they coughed up the cash to build them is an old tradition%2C but Safeco is horrible.  It%92s not even named after a company that is peripherally involved with baseball like Wrigley%3B Safeco is an insurance company.  Because when I go to a game and sit down with a hotdog and pop%2C I think of fiscal security.  Please.%0D%0A%0D%0AThe Seating%3A  Outstanding.  There are great seats everywhere you go.  I was sitting in the left field bleachers and they still were great.  Sitting in the cheap seats and still feeling like you could jump out onto the field is a cool feeling.  Also%2C you get paranoid a ball is going to fly out at you when your that close%2C which keeps your attention on the game.  I walked around the stadium before the game and scoped out the view from the various levels.  Even the 300 seats were decent.  %0D%0A%0D%0AThe Retractable Roof%3A  The much-ballyhooed feature that struck some people as an expensive frivolity was a nice feature for me.  If western Washington weather patterns had a mind%2C it would be bipolar.  Most of the time it cruises along at a predictable gray gloom%2C but sometimes it just freaks out and starts hailing for ten minutes than clears up with perfect blue skies then starts snowing after an hour.  I%92m not kidding.  All you can do is hole up in a house and stare in bizarre fascination.  So having an option to shield hapless fans from random acts of weather is A OK in my book.  Plus%2C since Safeco is next to the docks you get an ocean breeze from Puget Sound%2C which is nice.%0D%0A%0D%0ABullpen%3A  This is really cool.  On the ground floor is an area where you can sit and watch the pitchers warm from about 3 feet away separated by a metal chain link fence with TVs near by to watch the game.  The pitchers probably find it distracting to be gawked at by slack jawed yokels and hyperactive Japanese teens%2C but for a fan its cool to watch Kazuhiro Sasaki and Arthur Rhodes warm up before they Save the Day.%0D%0A%0D%0ARestaurants%3A  Its surreal to walk around the stadium and see a food court circle the field.  If you felt like it%2C you could get teriyaki%2C burgers%2C traditional hot dogs%2C and even chicken fingers.  It%92s all horribly overpriced%2C but that is to be expected almost.  There is even a place called the Hit It Here Caf%E9 where I heard everyone gets a free drink if a homerun is bounced off the windows.  It is placed pretty close behind the right field foul pole so it isn%92t unthinkable.  I don%92t recommend the garlic fries.  They smell good%2C but that%92s all they do.  I%92ve drunk water with more punch.%0D%0A%0D%0AThe Game%3A  Great game.  A classic pitcher%92s duel.  Both teams kept getting into trouble %28Hint%3A  DON%92T hit a guy with a pitch after walking two Garcia%2C it scares the fans and makes the pitching coach grouchy%29%2C but were saved by either good pitching or great fielding.  The M%92s managed to squeak two runs in and win though%2C so I was happy.  Come to think of it%2C I%92ve never attended a sporting event where the team I was rooting for hasn%92t won.  Maybe I should rent myself out.  Have Luck Will Travel%3F%0D%0A%0D%0AThe Team%3A  The Mariners are shaping up nicely this year.  After last year%92s stinker season and the loss of Lou Piniella%2C they%92ve bounced back and now have the best record in baseball.  The M%92s just need to shake that pesky habit of imploding during the playoffs.  I mean%2C we were tied as the most winingest team in baseball history%2C and we couldn%92t go to the World Series.  Sure%2C we don%92t have the eons of depression and supernatural curses the Red Sox have%2C but we%92ve never been to the Promised Land.  Why God%3F  Are we Seattleites not fanatical enough%3F  We wouldn%92t even have to win%3B just to get to the Series would be enough.  Please God%2C take pity on our gray little state%92s only baseball team.  %3Ebreaks down into uncontrollable sobbing%3C %0D%0A%0D%0A------%0D%0AJon Helscher%0D%0A%0D%0A%22At this point%2C it%27s not even about trying to make money.  I just don%27t want to be totally humiliated.%22