LAST EDITED ON Mar-09-10 AT 11:02 AM (EST)
 
...I feel obligated to keep posting these commentary threads.

...OTOH, it's 4am.

Blah. Will read and edit in the morning.

Rest'a y'all, enjoy.

*passes out*

ETA:

Right!~ So.

> Gryphon came to and briefly had no idea where he was or how he'd
> come to be there. His first thought was that this was a damned peculiar
> place for a cuddle.

This is an excellent opening line.

> "Something's not right," Gryphon murmured. He felt a strange
> vibe in the cool, crisp air of this deserted landscape. It put his
> nerves on edge, though he couldn't say why. He reached into the storage
> compartment, took out his scattergun, and offered it to the quarian.
> "You know how to use one of these?"
> "Bryar Seventeen, cut down. Sure," she replied. Then, tilting
> her head in puzzlement, she said, "You're giving me a weapon?"
> He nodded. "Something about this place I don't like," he said.
> "You might need it."

That's an effective device, I think - a combination of genre-savvy and the fact that a three-hundred-year-old fugitive from justice will damn well know when a situation is not only eyeing his backside, but be able to gauge the sharpness of its teeth from the prickles in his neck.

> The Gallant's full-power mode was intended as a desperation
> setting, for use when a Cyclone rider was in a very tight corner. It
> burned an entire one-megajoule ammo capacitor in a single shot, but the
> effect was worth it, because the tightly collimated particle beam
> punched straight through the gunship's armored window, and its armored
> pilot, and his armored seat, and the armored engine bay, and went
> straight out the back. The vehicle rocketed past overhead, its
> slipstream nearly blowing Gryphon over, clipped the top of the ridge
> behind them, and tumbled out of sight with a grinding scrape of metal on
> stone that ended in a satisfying THOOMP.

Goodness. That's a quite considerable amount of gun.

> "Heh, no, I think I'll make it. How are you doing in there?"
> "I'm good."
> "That's good. -I- need a bath."
> "Yes. You do."
> "Why don't you?"
> "The miracle of nanosanitation technology."
> "I don't think I want to investigate that more closely."
> "Good."

*gigglefit*