Ye gods (and goddesses, of course, can't forget Skuld!), I haven't laughed so hard in weeks. Wapiko's definitely her mother's daughter.

I also noticed another throwaway reference to the Utoniums. (Utonia?) Are they ever going to show up in person, or are y'all just going to keep teasing us?

Nitpick:

Citizens of Galveston, Brazoria, Harris, Chambers, and Liberty counties are to be on the lookout for this creature, shown here setting fire to an abandoned petroleum refinery in Lake Jackson.

Unless something's changed since I moved to Baton Rouge in January 1999, I don't seem to remember any refineries in Lake Jackson. All the plants and refineries and such are technically in Freeport and the surrounding really tiny towns. (Of course, considering how pathetically small every city in Brazoria County is, it really doesn't make much difference.) I lived there for about ten years and my dad worked at BASF's plant in Freeport; I know far more about the chemical industry than I ever wanted to.

Good story though, and I'm still amazed that anyone who doesn't live in Lake Jackson knows that it exists.

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"Daddy we've got the rhythm of life of life of life of life! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! YEAH!!!!!"