>My critique was more structurally based. It just kind of seems like
>Nax was there just to have a fight with; you insert an
>unambiguously evil bad guy with no real connection to the rest of the
>story or purpose for being other than for Nall to prove how badass he
>is (which Nall has already done a lot of times) by taking him down
>hard.

Actually, he's there for several reasons, of which the fight itself is probably the least significant. He's also there to provide key onlookers inside and outside the story with a heretofore unseen insight into the darker side of draconic culture, say a few things that make it more difficult for Umi and Nall to put certain thoughts back in their boxes, and reveal at least one important fact about Nall to several people who did not previously know it.

This installment is interesting to me mainly because not everything that gets raised in that way is immediately dealt with, but if I had immediately dealt with them (as feels like my more usual custom), I'd have people - possibly the same people, ironically enough - gigging me for everything being all pat and handled before the last commercial.

--G.
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Benjamin D. Hutchins, Co-Founder, Editor-in-Chief, & Forum Mod
Eyrie Productions, Unlimited http://www.eyrie-productions.com/
zgryphon at that email service Google has
Ceterum censeo Carthaginem esse delendam.