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Forum URL:	http://www.eyrie-productions.com/Forum/dcboard.cgi
Forum Name:	Eyrie Motors
Topic ID:	26
#ck of time%3B let%27s just say I wouldn%27t have been able to correct my parking job if I hadn%27t done it right the first time%2C and leave it at that. It expired as I put it in Park%2C and responded to no provocation thereafter%3B the electrical system had gone completely dark. Even the dome light didn%27t come on when I opened the door.%0D%0A%0D%0AAt a loss%2C I called my mother to let her know I%27d run into a bit of a problem. I was a hundred miles from home and 200 from my destination%2C and night was falling%3B I thought I might have to stay the night at the hotel I%27d just been beached at%2C but she has a brother who lives in Portland %28which I had just passed%29%2C and his wife worked at one of the car rental places at the airport there. So Mom called them to see if she could get a rental car sent up to rescue me.%0D%0A%0D%0AMeanwhile%2C I went into the hotel to ask if they minded if I left the car there for a day or two. I assumed they would say no and I%27d have to have it towed somewhere%2C probably to the Ford garage in Freeport%2C where they wouldn%27t be able to look at it until who knew when because it was Christmas%3B but the guy said sure%2C it%27s pretty slow here this time of year%2C as long as it%27s gone by New Year%27s we%27re cool. So that was nice.%0D%0A%0D%0AA little while later my uncle drove up in his own car%3B they hadn%27t been able to arrange a rental for reasons I cannot now remember %28maybe the holiday again%29%2C so instead%2C he and Mom had worked out a thing where he%27d take me up the Interstate and she%27d come down and meet us halfway%2C at a little town called Newport. We%27d all have dinner at the Pizza Hut there and then go our separate ways.%0D%0A%0D%0AIt was kind of surreal. Mom%27s brother was my favorite uncle when I was a kid%3B he lived up in Aroostook County then%2C and we used to hang out a lot whenever I was up there. He moved to Portland when I was in middle school%2C got married and unexpectedly started a family a bit late in life%2C and we%27d seen each other maybe twice in the... oh... 12 or so years since then. The trip wasn%27t awkward at all%2C but it was an odd reason for a reunion%2C and then when we got to Newport it was raining cats and dogs and the power was out. Strange scene in the parking lot of the shut-down 24-hour Irving station%2C transferring luggage in the dark and the pouring rain. Sort of put the kibosh on the %22dinner%22 part of the plan.%0D%0A%0D%0AThe day after Christmas%2C Dad and I drove back down to Freeport to see what was wrong with the car. Dad had a spare car battery with him%2C as you do%2C and when we put it in%2C the Crown Vic fired right up like nothing was wrong with it. From this we concluded that the alternator had failed%2C so we took up a mile or so up the road to an auto parts place we%27d noticed on the way in from the Interstate.%0D%0A%0D%0ANow%2C there are two things about replacing the alternator in a car. One is that you get reamed on the price of the new one unless you have an old one to trade for it. And the other is that%2C even in a big old car with as much free space as a Crown Vic has in its engine compartment%2C it takes a while.%0D%0A%0D%0AI wish I had been able to get a picture of us at work%2C but I wasn%27t%2C because cell phones didn%27t have cameras in them back then. It%27s a shame. There would be distinct comedy value in a photo of my father%2C bundled up in his old work coat%2C removing the alternator from my old Crown Vic in a snowy parking lot%2C directly under the sign on the side of the parts store reading%0D%0A%0D%0A%5Bb%5DFOR LIABILITY REASONS%0D%0ADO NOT WORK ON CARS%0D%0AIN THIS PARKING AREA%5B%2Fb%5D%0D%0A%0D%0AI%27m sure the guy working in the store knew exactly what was up when we walked in%2C all cold and red-faced%2C with a dead Ford alternator to trade it in for a fresh one%2C but I guess he was feeling some of the holiday spirit too%2C because he never said a word about it.%0D%0A%0D%0AWell%2C OK%2C I said I regretted buying the car once%2C but on balance%2C maybe the ensuing adventure canceled out the angst of the initial failure. %3A%29%0D%0A%0D%0AApart from that%2C I had a lovely time with the old heap%2C though by the middle of the next year it was getting decidedly creaky. Around that time%2C Dad mentioned that he knew someone who wanted to buy it as a Project Car%2C and I got a %22sorry we moved your job to Seattle%22 payout from the company that bought the place where I worked at around the same time%2C so I decided to sell out and use the money as a down payment on a newer vehicle. I can%27t remember if I made a profit on it%2C probably not%2C but what the hell.%0D%0A%0D%0AStrangely%2C although I never gave this car a name%2C I did later base a %5Blink%3Awww.eyrie-productions.com%2FForum%2Fdcboard.cgi%3Faz%3Dshow_thread%26om%3D258%26forum%3DDCForumID9%26viewmode%3Dall%236%7CTransformers OC%5D on it.%0D%0A%0D%0Ahttp%3A%2F%2Fwww.eyrie-productions.com%2FUF%2FFI%2FTF%2FGFX%2Fkhanna.Eclipse.cc.jpg%0D%0A%0D%0A--G.%0D%0A%2A not really%2C but%2C I mean...%0D%0A-%3E%3C-%0D%0ABenjamin D. Hutchins%2C Co-Founder%2C Editor-in-Chief%2C %26 Forum Mod%0D%0AEyrie Productions%2C Unlimited http%3A%2F%2Fwww.eyrie-productions.com%2F%0D%0Azgryphon at that email service Google has%0D%0A%5Bi%5DCeterum censeo Carthaginem esse delendam.%5B%2Fi%5D, Posted by on Dec-- at 00: AM #1, RE: Car Adventures: Crown Vic Posted by Nova Floresca on Apr-14-19 at 03:29 AM In response to message #0 Reading through the interesting* times you've had with cars, I'm not sure if I'm sad or happy my car-owning days have been pretty bland. To be sure, I've been in the presence of some very interesting times, but it's just not the same. in both positive and negative senses of the word. "This is probably a stupid question, but . . ." #2, RE: Car Adventures: Crown Vic* Posted by MuninsFire on Apr-14-19 at 02:31 PM In response to message #0 This reminds me of the '87 Land Yacht that I had for a brief time. So, around '05, my grandparents' health had declined to the point where they needed someone to help out around the house and assist them with things like the ...what was it, six? medications my grandfather was on for his Parkinson's and the ...many medications my grandmother was on for her Alzheimers-and-other-things. Simplifying the family politics drastically, I was unattached, available, and had no real career prospects to interrupt - so I got shipped out to California to stay with 'em for a few months while arrangements were made to move 'em into an assisted living facility. (This turned out to be a really excellent personal growth opportunity in a number of ways, but this story's about the car) One of the duties involved was to drive them to - well, wherever they needed to go. And the vehicle involved was an '87 Cadillac Brougham, in a color that was probably marketed as 'gold' but looked 'beige' to me. Much like Gryphon's Toronado, it had Power Everything except for the suspension which was some kind of pneumatic thingummy. However, as my prior car experience consisted of a Honda Odyssey and a very small Ford Festiva, I found the 'floatiness' of the vehicle ever so slightly unnerving. (Also it was -deeply- confusing to me that they'd contrived to put the gas cap behind the rear license plate; the first time I went to fill the thing took me a good several minutes before my grandfather clued me in where to look) Having learned to drive in Maine, I was familiar with the lack of resolution in steering, braking, acceleration, and sanity you get with driving on snow, and this monstrosity of a vehicle kind of felt like that all the time - the old Festiva I had been driving, even though it was an utter jalopy, had downright crisp steering by comparison with the slightly detached negotiation with which I had to address the navigation of the Yacht. Sure, you could steer it with one finger, but course corrections needed to be considered ahead of time because there just wasn't any kind of feedback to the hands - something which I rely on when driving. One of the rather...interesting aspects of the vehicle, though, was the aformentioned suspension. See, it was -extremely- cushy and would let you glide along over even rough, badly maintained roads with barely a quiver, which was good for my grandmother sitting in the back seat, who would complain about any significant jarring. Unfortunately, this suspension had a resonant frequency, somehow - a resonant frequency that happened to -exactly- equal the inputs from the dips in the US-101 between Ventura and Santa Barbara when travelling at 75mph, the normal speed-of-traffic in that corridor. Bottoming out the suspension on such a vehicle is very jarring and disturbing, and my grandmother was displeased when this discovery was made. There were several interesting stories that arose as a consequence of my driving that vehicle - which, well, was kind of fun, as it turned out; once it got up to speed (which was a very deliberate process, to be sure, given the thing's incredible mass) it would just...go. All day long. And it would behave exactly the same with one person in it as it would with four people and a trunk full of baggage - probably because the vehicle itself outmassed any potential cargo by such a significant factor. I ended up being given the car due to it not, er, fitting, physically, in the garage of the semi-assisted living community they moved to, and it served me well for a couple of years. Unfortunately, as seems to be the case with the car stories here, it did come to a tragic end: I was sitting behind an obnoxiously large SUV (a Tahoe, I think?) at a stoplight to turn left, and had some kids in a small sedan behind me; a small car came racing the red light from the opposite direction; and a jeep came out from a side street. Physics occurred, and the small car pushed the Tahoe to sit in my engine compartment, though I only rocked back barely enough to ding the bumper of the kids behind me - for whom it was the driver's first day driving under their own license. And, of course, being a kid with no budget, I didn't have the uninsured motorist coverage on my policy.... (Ended up bicycling to work for some months after that, through necessity, which kinda sucked for various reasons). Still. I got out of it without more than a bad scare, so the Land Yacht's enormous mass did manage to keep me safe, and that's what really counts in the end, no? Never did get to take it out to Vegas, though. That run through the high desert would've been fun. #3, RE: Car Adventures: Crown Vic Posted by Gryphon on Apr-14-19 at 03:09 PM In response to message #2 >And the vehicle involved was an '87 Cadillac Brougham, >in a color that was probably marketed as 'gold' but looked 'beige' to >me. Oh, one of the music teachers here in town had one of those. I think hers was a Fleetwood Brougham from the previous year, but they were the same thing. I always remember how nice it smelled inside. Mrs. Nash's was black on black with a license plate frame that said MAFIA STAFF CAR. >(Also it was -deeply- confusing to me that they'd contrived to put the >gas cap behind the rear license plate; the first time I went to fill >the thing took me a good several minutes before my grandfather clued >me in where to look) Heh, yeah, that was a General Motors Large Car thing for a lot of years. The Tempest, the Malibu I've mentioned earlier, the 1977 Caprice Classic we had for a while when I was a kid, the Toronado, that Pontiac I got from my grandparents, they all had that. Pretty sure the Impala does too. I think they finally had to stop doing it because of safety regulations—it makes the filler assembly vulnerable in a rear-end collision, although the tank itself is safely between the frame rails, unlike in say the Pinto—but I've always found it a really handy place to put that. Makes it so it doesn't matter which side of the car you approach the pumps from, which I'm sure was the idea behind doing it that way. My favorite fuel filler is on the 1957 full-size* Chevrolets. It's behind the chrome trim on the back of the driver's side tail fin. There is zero visual indication that that piece of the chrome is a door; you just have to know. >Unfortunately, >this suspension had a resonant frequency, somehow - a resonant >frequency that happened to -exactly- equal the inputs from the dips in >the US-101 between Ventura and Santa Barbara when travelling at 75mph, >the normal speed-of-traffic in that corridor. An unhelpful observation at this remove in time, but: It sounds like it might've needed its dampers adjusted, which was a pretty common problem with Cadillacs of that period. >Still. I got out of it without more than a bad scare, so the Land >Yacht's enormous mass did manage to keep me safe, and that's what >really counts in the end, no? In a car like that, the crumple zone is the other car. :) --G. * not that there was any other kind in 1957. Well, except the Corvette, I guess. -><- Benjamin D. Hutchins, Co-Founder, Editor-in-Chief, & Forum Mod Eyrie Productions, Unlimited http://www.eyrie-productions.com/ zgryphon at that email service Google has Ceterum censeo Carthaginem esse delendam. #4, RE: Car Adventures: Crown Vic Posted by drakensis on Apr-15-19 at 02:59 AM In response to message #3 LAST EDITED ON Apr-15-19 AT 03:00 AM (EDT) >My favorite fuel filler is on the 1957 full-size* Chevrolets. >It's behind the chrome trim on the back of the driver's side tail fin. > There is zero visual indication that that piece of the chrome >is a door; you just have to know. Yeah, I just watched a video yesterday of Chieftain (who reviews military vehicles on youtube) looking at a 1950s staff car, which was a 1957 Chevy. He had a bit of a search for the fuel filler before eventually finding it. Edit: a video which I now realise has generated its own thread #5, RE: Car Adventures: Crown Vic Posted by Gryphon on Apr-15-19 at 12:41 PM In response to message #3 >Heh, yeah, that was a General Motors Large Car thing for a lot of >years. The Tempest, the Malibu I've mentioned earlier, the 1977 >Caprice Classic we had for a while when I was a kid, the Toronado, >that Pontiac I got from my grandparents, they all had that. Pretty >sure the Impala does too. No, I misremembered this. The fuel door on the '62 Impala is clearly on the lefthand rear quarter panel. I know the license plate thing started in the '60s on full-size GM cars, but I guess it must have been on the generation after that one (which, for Chevrolet at least, started with the 1965 model year). --G. -><- Benjamin D. Hutchins, Co-Founder, Editor-in-Chief, & Forum Mod Eyrie Productions, Unlimited http://www.eyrie-productions.com/ zgryphon at that email service Google has Ceterum censeo Carthaginem esse delendam. #6, RE: Car Adventures: Crown Vic Posted by McFortner on Apr-15-19 at 07:43 PM In response to message #0 LAST EDITED ON Apr-15-19 AT 07:44 PM (EDT) We need to see Eclipse in a story now. I can even see the quote for the back of the packaging, "Just look at this for a second, slick." Michael C. Fortner "Maxim 37: There is no such thing as "overkill". There is only "open fire" and "I need to reload". p.s.: And he'd have to be voiced by Tommy Lee Jones.