Big Fire
Utopia Through Tyranny

FLASH TRAFFIC

CIPHER AUTHENTICATED; CLEARED

FROM: Q-Boss No. 878-G (Intelligence Division)
TO: Command Intelligence Center, Strategy Bureau
ATTN: Shokatsu Komei, Chief Strategist
DATE: Tue Oct 12 2410 02:39:19 -0000 GST

Lord Komei,

Mole Point Bravo Golf had a breakthrough last night; for a few minutes, they were able to intercept the voice comms used by the IPO-aligned local vigilante force popularly known as "BatCo". These comm systems evidently used a rotating frequency and a rotating encryption system, so penetrating them for even that long is a significant technical success.

Unfortunately, it appears that either the members of BatCo also employ a verbal cipher system that has so far defied cryptanalysis, or they have a tendency toward pointless, idle radio chatter. Since the latter is patently unlikely, Crypto Section is still working on it. In the meantime, since you asked to be kept apprised at all stages, here is the raw transcript of the intercept.

AoD,
Q878G

>>> ATTACHMENT: RAW COMM TRAFFIC INTERCEPT

NOTE: IDENTIFICATION TAGS ARE BASED ON VOICE ANALYSIS COMPARISON WITH PUBLIC SOURCES

BATMAN: ... said to the guy, well, how do you think my pack beast got knock-kneed?
LAUGHTER
12 SECOND SILENCE
BATGIRL: I'm bored, you guys.
CATWOMAN: Oh, come on. We've only been on this stakeout for 11 hours now. How could you possibly be bored.
BATGIRL: Also, I'm getting really tired of the stupid billboard on the bar across the way.
BATMAN: What does it say?
BATGIRL: It's an ad for Octoberfest. Which has been over for, like, a week. And isn't spelled with a C anyway.
CATWOMAN: I didn't realize you were an expert on Bavarian drinking festivals.
PENGUIN: I'll tell you what really gets me, is all those places that do things with some kind of wacky Oktoberfest-based pun.
BATGIRL: I know, right? Like on WQCQ they always have "Rocktoberfest". I could come up with a better gag than that in my sleep.
4 SECOND PAUSE
BATMAN: The Gotham Gun Club could have Glocktoberfest.
CATWOMAN: Or we could throw a neighborhood party downtown and call it Blocktoberfest.
BATMAN: Certain kinds of doctors could offer a discount all this month.
PENGUIN: ... Proctoberfest?
BATMAN: Yeah!
BATGIRL: Ew. Although actually, all doctors could do that and just call it Doctoberfest.
DR. FREEZE: Octavius Labs could have an open house and call it Doc Ocktoberfest.
CATWOMAN: Nice. Otto might even go for that.
BATMAN: Ooh! GBS-TV could do a special one-hour retrospective on the wrestling career of Waylon Jones.
BATGIRL: Oh man, I would watch the crap out of Croctoberfest.

INTERCEPT TERMINATES AT THIS POINT

MESSAGE ENDS

MESSAGE ENDS

They could have a flea market and call it Hocktoberfest.

Also, good for pysch profiling if nothing else.

Polychrome

>They could have a flea market and call it Hocktoberfest.
>
>Also, good for pysch profiling if nothing else.

Anyone trying to profile Helena and Steph better have a good supply of alcohol ready.

Matrix Dragon, J. Random Nutter

I could easily see the NA equivalent of Rifftrax having a film festival called "Mocktoberfest"...

shurely Schlocktoberfest? -- ed.

---
"Yeah, I'm definitely going to hell/But I'll have all the best stories to tell" -- Frank Turner, The Ballad of Me and My Friends

>shurely Schlocktoberfest? -- ed.
>
>---
>"Yeah, I'm definitely going to hell/But I'll have all the best stories
>to tell" -- Frank Turner, The Ballad of Me and My Friends

They were going to, but the Tayler family still holds the trademark.

>shurely Schlocktoberfest? -- ed.
>
>---

Howard Tayler used to do that with Schlock Mercenary, with a month-long horror story, but he got to the point where he couldn't base his stories around having a horror-segment in october. That one's taken.

Ah. I... don't read that any more. Perhaps I should pick it back up...

Of course, the month-long gay porn festival kinda writes itself.

---
"Yeah, I'm definitely going to hell/But I'll have all the best stories to tell" -- Frank Turner, The Ballad of Me and My Friends

If they sold stockings it would be "Socktoberfest".

Michael C. Fortner
"Maxim 37: There is no such thing as "overkill".
There is only "open fire" and "I need to reload".

If the beer was non-alcoholic they could call it Mocktoberfest.

A store that sells tableware could have a sale on their ceramic goods and call it Crocktoberfest. The potential of a Waylon Jones crossover promotion would only make it even better.

Moving away from bad puns, I love how the bat family is so mysterious, or Big Fire is so convinced of conspiracies and secrets everywhere, that they're trying to decrypt this conversation. I suspect the later reason is more plausible for this generation of Bats.

Matrix Dragon, J. Random Nutter

>Moving away from bad puns, I love how the bat family is so mysterious,
>or Big Fire is so convinced of conspiracies and secrets everywhere,
>that they're trying to decrypt this conversation. I suspect the later
>reason is more plausible for this generation of Bats.

To be fair, I suspect that the average Big Fire operative does -not- want to be the one that tells the local superior that they couldn't be bothered to try to suss out any secret communication because the conversation sounds inane. Especially if they're in intelligence.

--------

this world created by the
hands of the gods
everything is false
everything is a LIE
the final days have come
now
let everything be destroyed

--mu

Dare I mention the Decepticon version?