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Eyrie Productions, Unlimited
Charter Member
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Dec--, 00: AM (EDT) |
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d hurried to her own%2C rather smaller%2C office a few doors down. Slipping behind her desk%2C she picked up the phone%2C pressed the green button in the lower right corner%2C and said%2C %22This is Caitlin Fairchild in HEP%2C%22 pronouncing the letters individually. %22I need to speak to Agent Durgo. Urgently.%22%0D%0A%0D%0A%5Bhr%5D%0D%0A%0D%0ABruce Banner was sitting at his desk%2C staring disconsolately into the lambent green glow of his Lens%2C when his office door beeped an override and his boss slipped inside. He looked up at her%2C red-eyed and miserable%2C and said nothing.%0D%0A%0D%0ASkuld Ravenhair regarded him for a few seconds%2C then said%2C %22So. I hear you%27re not feeling so well lately.%22%0D%0A%0D%0ABanner laughed hollowly. %22That%27s a polite way of putting it.%22 He slumped in his chair%2C his hands slack on his desk blotter%2C and said hopelessly%2C %22I think I%27m losing my mind.%22%0D%0A%0D%0A%22Hmm. Well%2C we can%27t have that%2C%22 said Skuld. %22Also%2C I%27m told that if something isn%27t done soon%2C your whole science team is going to quit en masse and go work for Roxxon. That%27d be bad on a %5Bi%5Dnumber%5B%2Fi%5D of levels.%22 She rounded his desk and said%2C %22Let me see your Lens.%22%0D%0A%0D%0ABanner held up his left hand and sat passively while Skuld examined the gem strapped to his wrist%2C making occasional %22hmm%22 noises. Then she said%2C %22OK. I%27m going to level with you. I think I may have screwed up.%22%0D%0A%0D%0AHe raised an eyebrow. %22You%3F Screw up%3F%22%0D%0A%0D%0A%22Yep. That%27s your cosmic lesson for the day%3A Even the gods screw up. In fact%2C%22 Skuld added wryly%2C %22if you%27ve read any Norse mythology%2C it shows we screw up on a pretty regular basis. However%21%22 she went briskly on. %22I%27m pretty sure I know what I did and how to fix it. It%27ll probably be hard work%2C harder now than it would%27ve if I%27d caught my mistake when I made it%2C but... %22 She shrugged. %22Still fixable. The question is%2C do you want me to try again%3F It%27s totally up to you. It%27s your dharma we%27re talking about%2C after all.%22%0D%0A%0D%0ABanner regarded her for a few long moments%2C his face unmoving%3B then he said%2C %22My answer%27s the same as it was the first time. If you think you can help%2C then do it.%22 With a wan half-smile%2C he added%2C %22I%27m not really in a position to hold anyone%27s initial miscalculations against them... %22%0D%0A%0D%0ASkuld chuckled. %22That%27s the spirit%2C%22 she said. Without relinquishing his left wrist%2C she reached to his desk phone%2C punched the blue button%2C and said%2C %22Barney%2C Dr. Banner%27s leaving the office for a while. Just log him on special assignment%2C s%27il vous plait.%22%0D%0A%0D%0A%22Roger that%2C ma%27am%2C%22 Barney replied.%0D%0A%0D%0A%22OK%2C lock your terminal%2C Dr. Banner%2C%22 said Skuld as she switched off the intercom. %22You%27re going to Valhalla%21%22 Then%2C realizing how her remark might be interpreted%2C she went a little red and added%2C %22Not in that way. Hang on%21%22%0D%0A%0D%0A%5Bhr%5D%0D%0A%0D%0A%22OK%2C here%27s the deal%2C%22 Skuld said%2C raising her voice slightly to be heard over the icy wind that was howling across the snow-swept%2C night-bathed plateau on which they now stood. %22Your problem%3F Is this.%22%0D%0A%0D%0ASo saying%2C she did something with the hand that still held Banner%27s wrist%2C and with a metallic %5Bi%5Dclick%5B%2Fi%5D%2C he felt her hold release. His hand fell slack to his side. Next to him%2C Skuld held up his Lens%2C now dark%2C twisting gently in the wind on its unlatched band.%0D%0A%0D%0AAlready beginning to shiver%2C Banner blinked at her in horrified astonishment. %22But - I need that to - %22%0D%0A%0D%0A%22No%2C see%2C that%27s the problem. You don%27t need it to. In fact%2C making you think you needed it to was just about the worst thing we could have done at the time.%22%0D%0A%0D%0ABanner began shivering in the cold. With his right hand%2C he drew his lab coat tighter around his shoulders%2C while his left reached vaguely for the Lens. %22But - %22%0D%0A%0D%0A%22But nothing%2C Bruce.%22 She regarded the dark Lens for a moment%2C then glanced at Banner%2C who was beginning to go slightly blue. He was staring at the gem the way an addict looks at a fix that%27s being held just out of his reach%2C and she knew that if she held it there in his sight any longer%2C he%27d forget himself entirely and try to take it from her soon.%0D%0A%0D%0ASo%2C and since neither of them was going to need it any longer%2C she dismissed it%2C letting it dissolve in a spray of bright green sparks that scattered in the wind and were gone.%0D%0A%0D%0A%22%5Bi%5DNo - %21%5B%2Fi%5D%22 Banner cried%2C lunging toward where the sparks had vanished. Then he turned back to Skuld and said%2C %22Do you have any %5Bi%5Didea%5B%2Fi%5D what you just did%3F%21%22%0D%0A%0D%0A%22Of course I do. I told you%2C it%27s going to take hard work to fix this mess. This is how it starts. You probably ought to just take your lab coat off%2C%22 she added. %22If you don%27t%2C it%27s just going to get ruined.%22%0D%0A%0D%0A%22You - you %5Bi%5Dwant%5B%2Fi%5D me to change%3F%21%22 Banner blurted.%0D%0A%0D%0A%22I %5Bi%5Dneed%5B%2Fi%5D you to change%2C%22 Skuld replied imperturbably.%0D%0A%0D%0AAlready going numb with the cold%2C feeling the rising panic about to overwhelm him%2C Banner had just enough time to choke out%2C %22Well%2C you%27re about to get your wish%2C%22 and then his eyes went bright green and the transformation began.%0D%0A%0D%0ASkuld stood and watched%2C as fascinated as she%27d been the first time she had seen it happen%2C while Bruce Banner%27s frail body grew and changed. It was almost like a time-lapse image of a plant growing%2C the physicist%27s form bursting upward and outward into a massively muscled%2C green-skinned creature that still bore the shape of a person%2C but one distorted to almost comical extremes of breadth and power - more like an ogre%2C to Skuld%27s Asgardian sensibilities%2C or a particularly brawny troll%2C than a man. No ogre had ever had that emerald skin tone%2C though%2C nor so human a face - for even distorted by its enormous growth and twisted with fury%2C the face of this creature was still plainly human.%0D%0A%0D%0AFreed from his confinement in the depths of Banner%27s mind for the first time since the Zeltos Incident the previous spring and only the second time in several years%2C the Incredible Hulk threw back his huge head and roared into the icy%2C star-spangled sky for near-on a minute. Then he spotted Skuld and got %5Bi%5Dreally%5B%2Fi%5D angry.%0D%0A%0D%0A%22%5Bi%5DYou%21%5B%2Fi%5D%22 he bellowed%2C his voice deep and hoarse. %22Hulk %5Bi%5Dknow%5B%2Fi%5D you%21 You help %5Bi%5DBanner%5B%2Fi%5D. Help him %5Bi%5Dtrap%5B%2Fi%5D Hulk%21 Say you %5Bi%5Dtame%5B%2Fi%5D Hulk%21%22 He clenched his enormous fists%2C looming over her. %22Put Hulk in %5Bi%5Ddark%21%5B%2Fi%5D%22%0D%0A%0D%0ASkuld stood her ground%2C looking him straight in the eye. %22I did. I%27m sorry. I didn%27t know any better at the time. I brought you here to put things right.%22%0D%0A%0D%0A%22You help Banner send Hulk away once before. Now you try to %5Bi%5Dtrick%5B%2Fi%5D Hulk%21 %5Bi%5DHulk not listen to you%21%5B%2Fi%5D%22%0D%0A%0D%0AAnd so saying%2C the Hulk turned and leaped away into the night%2C despite his complete lack of any idea where he was or where he was going.%0D%0A%0D%0A%5Bi%5DGeneral%2C we have him%2C%5B%2Fi%5D came the mental voice of her adjutant%2C Colonel Brynhildr Silverspear%2C through her Lens. %5Bi%5DThe tracking instruments you provided work perfectly. Should we intercept%3F%5B%2Fi%5D%0D%0A%0D%0A%5Bi%5DNegative%2C%5B%2Fi%5D Skuld replied. %5Bi%5DJust make sure he stays within the proving ground and let him do his thing. I%27m pretty sure he%27ll stay%3B there%27s plenty to smash. Hulk likes smashing things. It helps him think.%5B%2Fi%5D%0D%0A%0D%0A%5Bi%5DI can tell when you%27re being sarcastic%2C%5B%2Fi%5D Brynhildr reminded her.%0D%0A%0D%0A%5Bi%5DJust let him vent%2C%5B%2Fi%5D Skuld said. %5Bi%5DI have to prepare Phase 2.%5B%2Fi%5D%0D%0A%0D%0AShe stood alone in the snowy waste for a moment%2C listening to the distant roars and crashes as the Hulk managed his anger%3B then she turned and walked away.%0D%0A%0D%0A%5Bhr%5D%0D%0A%0D%0ADawn%2C and the Hulk sat amid the ruins of what had been a simulated Jotun village - part of the Valkyrie training ground in the highlands north of the Golden City. Having spent the evening destroying same%2C the Hulk was as content as the Hulk ever got.%0D%0A%0D%0AAt least until the tall%2C red-skinned woman in the black uniform showed up.%0D%0A%0D%0A%22Hey there%2C big guy%2C%22 she said%2C leaning jauntily against a still-upright fragment of a shattered wall. %22Taking a break%3F%22%0D%0A%0D%0AThe Hulk glanced up at her%2C frowning. %22Leave Hulk alone%2C%22 he said.%0D%0A%0D%0A%22OK%2C%22 the woman replied affably. %22Before I go%2C though%2C I just want to say I%27m impressed. You are %5Bi%5Dseriously%5B%2Fi%5D good at smashing stuff.%22 She gestured to the remains of the training compound. %22If this was an actual Jotun village%2C they%27d be flattered by the job you%27ve done. They%27d rename it in your honor when they put it back up. It%27d be worth bragging points to live in Hulkheim. I mean it%2C dude%2C you are an %5Bi%5Dartist%5B%2Fi%5D.%22 She grinned and socked a fist into the opposite palm. %22An artist of SMASH.%22%0D%0A%0D%0AThe Hulk grunted. %22Hulk not hear that much.%22%0D%0A%0D%0AThe red woman sat down on a chunk of rubble a few yards away. %22I know%2C right%3F%22 she said companionably. %22Usually it%27s %27look at the mess you%27ve made%27 or %27what kind of monster are you%27 or %27my God%2C it%27s heading this way.%27 A lot of the time they don%27t even engage with you%2C and when they do it%27s just to yell at you or talk down to you.%22 She blew out a sigh%2C puffing her cheeks. %22I been there%2C man. About a million times%2C growing up. It ain%27t fun.%22%0D%0A%0D%0AThe Hulk regarded her for a moment%2C saying nothing.%0D%0A%0D%0A%22Sorry%2C I said I%27d leave you alone%2C didn%27t I%3F%22 The woman started to get up%2C but the Hulk gave another noncommittal grunt.%0D%0A%0D%0A%22Red lady can stay%2C%22 he said. %22Hulk not care.%22%0D%0A%0D%0AShe sat back down again%3B for a minute or two they just sat there looking at each other in silence.%0D%0A%0D%0AThen the Hulk said%2C %22Hulk bored.%22%0D%0A%0D%0AThe black-clad woman looked around. %22Yeah%2C you%27ve kinda run out of stuff to smash here%2C huh.%22 She got up. %22Tell you what%21 I know where there%27s a whole %5Bi%5Dbunch%5B%2Fi%5D of stuff you can smash%2C and nobody%27ll yell at you about it. You%27ll be doing people a favor.%22 She grinned again. %22Whaddaya say%3F Let%27s give it a try.%22%0D%0A%0D%0AThe Hulk clambered to his feet%2C looking intrigued. %22No one yell at Hulk%3F%22%0D%0A%0D%0A%22Nope. And if you do a good job%2C there%27s mead after%21%22%0D%0A%0D%0A%22Hulk not know what that is.%22%0D%0A%0D%0A%22You%27ll like it. Trust me.%22%0D%0A%0D%0A%5Bhr%5D%0D%0A%0D%0ABruce Banner was accustomed to waking up without any idea where he was%2C with a worn and aching body%2C with a looming sense of dread over what may have happened during the recent blank space in his memory%2C and without any pants on. As such%2C what happened to him the next morning was not%2C in general terms%2C really all that weird.%0D%0A%0D%0AWaking up %5Bi%5Din a bed%5B%2Fi%5D with such preconditions%2C on the other hand%2C that was new. It usually happened in a cave somewhere%2C or out in the desert%2C or deep in the woods%2C not in a well-turned-out bedroom in some kind of heavy-timbered%2C high-ceilinged ski lodge type of place. There was even a window on the far wall with a spectacular view of some snowy peaks off in the distance%2C assuming it wasn%27t a holo or something.%0D%0A%0D%0AAs such%2C it was an even more deeply disoriented Bruce Banner than usual who sat up and looked around the room%2C trying in vain to piece together what in the world had happened to him in the previous 24 to 48 hours. He was%2C in fact%2C so disoriented that it did not immediately occur to him to be surprised that there was a woman in bed with him.%0D%0A%0D%0AWhen it %5Bi%5Ddid%5B%2Fi%5D occur to him%2C he recoiled in surprise%2C nearly falling off the side of the bed. In response%2C she blinked awake%2C yawned%2C and gave him a lazy smile.%0D%0A%0D%0A%22Good morning%2C Dr. Banner%2C%22 she said. %22I trust you slept well.%22%0D%0A%0D%0ABanner sat with the covers bunched around his waist and stared at her%2C dumbfounded%2C as she got out of bed%2C picked a black uniform off the back of a nearby chair%2C and climbed into it. There was%2C he noticed now that she was standing%2C an awful lot of her. She had to be seven feet tall and proportioned accordingly%2C like a somewhat oversized statue of some ancient%2C athletic divinity or other.%0D%0A%0D%0AOh%2C and she was red. Bright red%2C with slightly glowing yellow eyes.%0D%0A%0D%0A%22What the %5Bi%5Dhell%2C%5B%2Fi%5D%22 Banner muttered.%0D%0A%0D%0AThe red woman finished buckling on a pair of biker-ish boots%2C straightened%2C made sure all her long black hair was clear of her collar%2C and smiled at him again. %22You don%27t remember me at all%2C do you%3F Hmm. That%27s interesting. Well%2C all will be revealed soon enough... so to speak%2C%22 she added with a grinning wink. Banner felt his face go hot and said nothing. %22In the meantime%2C I%27ve got to go to work%2C but you make yourself at home%2C sweetie. The shower%27s through there%2C there are pants in the wardrobe%2C coffee%27s downstairs%2C and Dr. J will be here to see you in half an hour.%22 She went briskly to the door%2C then paused and blew him a kiss. %22See you around%2C hon.%22%0D%0A%0D%0ABanner sat alone in the comfortable%2C homey room for a few moments%2C utterly at a loss.%0D%0A%0D%0AThen he said%2C %22%27Hon%27%3F%21%22 and went to have a shower.%0D%0A%0D%0AOutside the chalet%2C the red woman met Skuld with a grin and a salute.%0D%0A%0D%0A%22Phase 2 complete%2C General%21%22 she reported cheerfully.%0D%0A%0D%0ASkuld tried and mostly failed to give her a stern look. %22I think you %5Bi%5Dmay%5B%2Fi%5D have exceeded your instructions%2C Betty.%22%0D%0A%0D%0ABetty snorted. %22Yeah%2C well%2C you%27re not gonna hear %5Bi%5Dhim%5B%2Fi%5D complaining%2C%22 she said%2C angling a thumb back toward the chalet.%0D%0A%0D%0ABack inside%2C Banner finished showering%2C got dressed in the unfamiliar but well-fitting clothes he found in the wardrobe%2C went downstairs%2C and had some coffee in the startlingly modern%2C Bauhaus-esque kitchen%2C wondering whether what was happening to him was still part of Skuld%27s plan.%0D%0A%0D%0AIt would have helped him in that analysis if he had known what Skuld%27s plan even %5Bi%5Dwas%5B%2Fi%5D. He knew it was supposed to help him out with his Hulk problem%2C though how destroying his Lens and stranding him in Valhalla was supposed to help %28if that%27s where he even was%29%2C he wasn%27t sure about. He felt pretty relaxed right now%2C even considering his absurd situation%2C but all it would take was another panic attack%2C or a flash of temper%2C or a spike of particularly intense frustration%2C to trigger another transformation... and another rampage.%0D%0A%0D%0AHe sighed. He knew Skuld well enough by now to know that even if she were here for him to ask%2C she wouldn%27t give him a straight answer. She didn%27t work that way. Maybe %5Bi%5Dcouldn%27t%5B%2Fi%5D work that way when dealing in the high metaphysics involved in the making and maintenance of Lensmen. Banner didn%27t really know - magic was a long way from his field - but it seemed not entirely unreasonable that that might be the case. And in any event%2C the notion was comforting%2C because it would mean that she wasn%27t just messing with him.%0D%0A%0D%0AAs he had that thought%2C he heard the chalet%27s front door open and close%2C then the sound of footsteps in the hallway. There was a brief pause - sound of the coat closet by the entrance being opened and shut - and then a man walked into the kitchen from the foyer and smiled at Banner. He was of average height and slim%2C and would have been unremarkable in appearance if not for the way he was dressed. In his high-collared shirt%2C neatly knotted cravat%2C waistcoat and black frock coat%2C he looked like pictures Banner had seen of Victorian physicians making their rounds.%0D%0A%0D%0AThis impression was not in any way dispelled by his voice when he spoke%3A %22Aha. Dr. Banner%2C I presume%21 No%2C don%27t get up%2C dear fellow.%22 He sat down on the chrome stool opposite Banner%27s at the kitchen island. %22I imagine you must have many questions.%22%0D%0A%0D%0A%22Only three of any real importance%2C%22 Banner replied. %22Where am I%3F How did I get here%3F And who are you%3F%22%0D%0A%0D%0A%22You are in the home of B%C3%A8thildr Forgeheart%2C one of Lady Skuld%27s Valkyrie. You came here under your own power and of your own free will%2C or rather your %5Bi%5Dalter ego%5B%2Fi%5D did. And I%2C%22 he continued%2C rising and making his way to the Keurig%2C %22am a doctor.%22 While he set up the machine to make him his own cup of coffee%2C he went on%2C %22One whose area of expertise happens uniquely to suit him for undertaking the task of helping you with your problem.%22 Turning to face Banner%2C he smiled again and gave a short but courteous bow. %22My name is Jekyll%2C my dear sir. Henry Jekyll%2C MD%2C at your service.%22%0D%0A%0D%0ABanner blinked at him.%0D%0A%0D%0A%22I thought you were a myth%2C%22 he said. %22And dead.%22%0D%0A%0D%0AJekyll laughed gaily. %22You%27re drinking coffee in the mountain retreat of a Valkyrie fire giantess%2C Doctor. Is %5Bi%5Deither%5B%2Fi%5D consideration really an obstacle to my presence under those conditions%3F%22%0D%0A%0D%0ABanner had to concede that he had a point.%0D%0A%0D%0A%22In any event%2C you%27ve heard of me%2C so that simplifies matters%2C%22 Jekyll went on%2C collecting his coffee. %22Come%2C let%27s adjourn to Miss Forgeheart%27s excellent sitting room and get started. We have a lot of work to do%2C you and I.%22%0D%0A%0D%0AFeeling a strange mixture of hope and extreme skepticism%2C Banner carried his coffee through a soaring polished-pine arch and into a living room that was%2C as Jekyll had said%2C excellent - a great open space with a high timbered ceiling%2C oversized and overstuffed furniture%2C and an enormous sweep of full-length windows which revealed that the whole room was cantilevered out into a majestic canyon dividing the mountains he%27d glimpsed from upstairs before. It was gorgeous and ever-so-slightly vertigo-inducing%2C so Banner was glad of the presence of the vast and fluffy sofa as he sank into one end of it%2C holding his coffee cup carefully upright.%0D%0A%0D%0AJekyll took a seat in a matching armchair opposite%2C crossing his legs elegantly at the knee%2C sipped his coffee%2C and then asked without preamble%2C %22Dr. Banner%2C what do you think the Hulk %5Bi%5Dis%3F%5B%2Fi%5D%22%0D%0A%0D%0ABanner blinked at him. %22What do I think he %5Bi%5Dis%3F%5B%2Fi%5D%22 he said.%0D%0A%0D%0A%22Yes.%22%0D%0A%0D%0A%22I... he%27s... %22 Banner stared into his coffee for a moment%2C then looked up at his improbable interlocutor and said firmly%2C %22He%27s a %5Bi%5Dmonster.%5B%2Fi%5D He%27s.. the dark parts of me%2C set loose to plague the world. Destruction and hatred. Mindless rage.%22%0D%0A%0D%0AJekyll nodded. %22You hate him.%22%0D%0A%0D%0A%22Of course I hate him%21%22 Banner snapped. %22He%27s everything I%27ve spent my life trying not to be. When he%27s set free%2C he leaves my life in ruins. He%27s %5Bi%5Dme%5B%2Fi%5D%2C reduced to a mindless animal%2C but given almost limitless power.%22%0D%0A%0D%0A%22That%27s the second time you%27ve used that word%2C%22 Jekyll observed. %22Mindless. Do you really think the Hulk has no mind%3F%22%0D%0A%0D%0A%22Of course he doesn%27t. I %5Bi%5Dam%5B%2Fi%5D the Hulk%2C and yet my time as him is just a white-hot blankness in my memory. Everything that makes me %5Bi%5Dhuman%5B%2Fi%5D blotted out by rage.%22%0D%0A%0D%0A%22And so he %5Bi%5Dmakes%5B%2Fi%5D you angry. Bit of a vicious circle%2C that.%22%0D%0A%0D%0A%22I%27ve learned to control it. It%27s not likely these days that I can make %5Bi%5Dmyself%5B%2Fi%5D angry enough to change. Some outside stimulus is required for that. Although... %22 Banner hesitated. %22Since I got my Lens%2C keeping him at bay without it is... harder. I guess because I%27ve gotten so used to relying on it that I%27m out of practice.%22%0D%0A%0D%0A%22Your original Lens enabled you to be the Hulk%2C but keep your own mind. That must have been extraordinary.%22%0D%0A%0D%0A%22I thought it would be%2C but it was actually disappointing%2C%22 Banner admitted. %22I always felt self-conscious as the Hulk. As if someone was watching me and... %22 He shrugged. %22Finding my performance wanting%2C maybe%3F I%27m not sure how to describe it. There was always a sense of frustration%2C like I could never really reach my potential that way.%22%0D%0A%0D%0A%22What would you say if I told you there %5Bi%5Dwas%5B%2Fi%5D someone watching%3F%22 Jekyll asked. %22Someone for whom your Lens was a constant torment%2C whose every day while you wore it was filled with pain%2C and cold%2C and darkness%3F%22%0D%0A%0D%0ABanner raised an eyebrow. %22What the hell are you talking about%3F%22 he asked.%0D%0A%0D%0A%22I%27m talking%2C Dr. Banner%2C %5Bi%5Dabout the Hulk.%5B%2Fi%5D%22%0D%0A%0D%0ABanner stared at him. It took him a few moments to find his voice again. When he did%2C what he said was%2C %22That%27s ridiculous.%22%0D%0A%0D%0A%22Is it%3F Your Lens enabled you to %5Bi%5Dhijack%5B%2Fi%5D the Hulk%27s body and use it as if it were your own. Hence your constant sense of dissociation while in his stolen form.%22%0D%0A%0D%0A%22You%27re talking like the Hulk is a separate %5Bi%5Dperson%5B%2Fi%5D%2C%22 Banner objected.%0D%0A%0D%0A%22He is%2C%22 Jekyll replied calmly. %22That%27s what Skuld failed to understand when she made your first Lens. Do you remember her telling you that she thought she had blundered%3F That%27s what she was talking about. She assumed%2C as you did%2C that the Hulk%27s mind was simply your own with most of your... let%27s call them your more %5Bi%5Dcerebral%5B%2Fi%5D qualities... blotted out by anger. It%27s not. It is a separate consciousness all its own. One %5Bi%5Dbuilt%5B%2Fi%5D from elements of your personality%2C surely%2C but %5Bi%5Dnot%5B%2Fi%5D your personality.%22%0D%0A%0D%0A%22That%27s %5Bi%5Dabsurd%5B%2Fi%5D%2C%22 Banner said. %22You%27re telling me that on top of all my other problems%2C I have a split personality%3F%22%0D%0A%0D%0AJekyll shook his head. %22You aren%27t listening%2C Doctor. The Hulk is %5Bi%5Dnot%5B%2Fi%5D an alternate personality. If that were the case%2C he would still be you... but the problem is%2C he %5Bi%5Disn%27t%5B%2Fi%5D. He shares your body%2C but %5Bi%5Dnot%5B%2Fi%5D your mind.%22 He held up his hands%2C palms up and outward. %22Two souls... %22 He closed his hands into a double fist. %22... one body. Two people%3B one physical being.%22%0D%0A%0D%0A%22I don%27t believe in that kind of mysticism%2C%22 Banner protested.%0D%0A%0D%0A%22You%27re sitting in a Valkyrie%27s living room and still you bleat about mysticism%21%22 Jekyll said. %22You%27re a scientist%2C Dr. Banner. Use your scientific mind. You know the Spengler phenomenon is real%3B you may not be a paraphysicist%2C but you must have covered the subject at least lightly in undergraduate general physics.%22 He sighed faintly. %22In a way%2C this would actually be simpler if you were dead.%22%0D%0A%0D%0ABanner gave him a skeptical look. %22I beg your pardon%3F%22%0D%0A%0D%0A%22By that I mean the explanation would take care of itself%2C%22 Jekyll said. %22If you had come to Valhalla the %5Bi%5Dusual%5B%2Fi%5D way%2C as I did%2C it%27d be as plain as day. I%27d be talking to you both at once. When I perished%2C many years ago%2C my %27other%27 and I arrived here separately. It was the first time we%27d ever seen each other face to face.%22 He chuckled. %22Quite a revelation%2C I assure you.%22%0D%0A%0D%0AWhen Banner didn%27t reply%2C Jekyll went on%2C %22At any rate%2C Dr. Banner%2C what you were doing didn%27t work. You%27ve tried suppressing the Hulk%3B it didn%27t work. All it did was torture him and make %5Bi%5Dyou%5B%2Fi%5D deeply unpleasant to be around. And threaten your life%2C by the way. If you had kept on trying to ignore the discomfort you were feeling and focus through it%2C in all likelihood you would eventually have suffered a fatal stroke.%22%0D%0A%0D%0ABanner frowned. %22So my options are to suppress the Hulk%2C which will kill me%2C or let him keep destroying my life%3F%22%0D%0A%0D%0A%22Not at all. What you and %5Bi%5Dyour%5B%2Fi%5D %27other%27 must do is learn to %5Bi%5Dlive%5B%2Fi%5D with each other. You need to see each other not as enemies to be loathed%2C feared%2C and avoided%2C but as what you %5Bi%5Dare%5B%2Fi%5D. You%27re brothers%2C Dr. Banner. Complementary beings. At the risk of sounding a bit new-age about it%2C you must learn to %5Bi%5Daccept%5B%2Fi%5D the Hulk... and teach %5Bi%5Dhim%5B%2Fi%5D to accept %5Bi%5Dyou%5B%2Fi%5D%2C which may be the harder of the two tasks now that you%27ve spent several years subjecting him to the torture of wearing another man%27s Lens.%22%0D%0A%0D%0ABanner blinked. %22Another - %22%0D%0A%0D%0A%22Exactly. Your Lens was made for you%2C not him. All the time you wore it%2C it %5Bi%5Dtore%5B%2Fi%5D at him. Tried to snuff him out. It only failed because his soul is apparently as invincible as the rest of him... but it can%27t have been any fun.%22%0D%0A%0D%0ABanner took a few silent moments to take all that on board. He wasn%27t sure he believed Jekyll%27s thesis that the Hulk was an independent being with his own soul and feelings - beyond believing it%2C he wasn%27t sure whether he could %5Bi%5Daccept%5B%2Fi%5D it - but if it %5Bi%5Dwas%5B%2Fi%5D true...%0D%0A%0D%0A%22Where would I even %5Bi%5Dstart%3F%5B%2Fi%5D%22 he asked.%0D%0A%0D%0A%22You already have%2C%22 Jekyll replied mildly%2C sipping his coffee. %22Our next step%2C though%2C needs to be creating a channel of communication between the two of you. Unless you can communicate%2C you%27re never going to reach any kind of balance.%22%0D%0A%0D%0A%22How are we going to do that%3F%22%0D%0A%0D%0A%22Well... I suppose we ought to start with the simplest method first%2C%22 Jekyll said. He reached into his inside pocket and removed a small device%2C then leaned forward and placed it on the coffee table between them. %22Do you have anything you%27d like to %5Bi%5Dsay%5B%2Fi%5D to the Hulk%2C Dr. Banner%3F%22%0D%0A%0D%0A%5Bhr%5D%0D%0A%0D%0AFor the first week they worked on some simple talk therapy%2C getting Banner used to the idea of thinking of the Hulk as a person. He made recordings of his thoughts%2C first cathartic%2C then more rational%2C until the exercise came to seem more like making an audio journal for a friend or distant relative%27s later perusal than an act of psychoanalytic outreach %28or inreach%2C he supposed%29. In between%2C there were methods of meditation to study%2C calming techniques Jekyll had picked up in the mysterious East during his first life. Banner didn%27t see the woman whose house he inhabited again during all that time.%0D%0A%0D%0AIn the second week%2C Jekyll pronounced him ready to leave the mountains and venture into the Golden City. They went to the great hall of Valhalla and spent what seemed like a few days prowling its nigh-infinite corridors%2C speaking to ancient masters and sages. Banner had studied these matters a little bit during his time as a fugitive%2C hoping they could help him keep the raging beast within him in check%2C but it had never availed him much. Now%2C though%2C he didn%27t have that ultimate %28and%2C if Jekyll was to be believed%2C ultimately misguided%29 goal in mind%2C and it seemed to come more easily%2C or make more sense%2C or both.%0D%0A%0D%0AIn the %5Bi%5Dthird%5B%2Fi%5D week%2C they went back to the rubble-strewn proving ground where the Hulk had first come to Valhalla%2C and Jekyll said%2C %22So far we%27ve just been concentrating on you. Now it%27s time to bring the other party into the picture.%22%0D%0A%0D%0ABanner blinked at him. %22I beg your pardon%3F%22%0D%0A%0D%0A%22Your transformations to date have been involuntary%2C%22 Jekyll said. %22Obviously%2C that won%27t %5Bi%5Ddo%5B%2Fi%5D going forward.%22 So saying%2C he closed his eyes and%2C with a quiet smile on his face%2C took a deep breath - %0D%0A%0D%0A - and changed%2C with a minimum of fuss%2C from a slim%2C calmly handsome%2C sandy-haired gentleman into a huge%2C enormously broad-shouldered%2C beetle-browed man with bristling black hair and side whiskers. His clothes changed with him%2C in a manner that defied Banner%27s direct observation%2C from the slightly dandified gentleman%27s finery Jekyll favored into a coarser%2C more workmanlike%2C but still distinctly anachronistic ensemble whose key features were a bottle-green vest and a pair of big%2C chunky black boots that looks very suitable for kicking in doors %28and possibly heads%29.%0D%0A%0D%0A%22So %27Enry an%27 me%2C%22 said Mr. Edward Hyde in an accent that owed more to Seven Dials than St. George%27s%2C %22%27ave a few tricks to teach.%22%0D%0A%0D%0A%5Bhr%5D%0D%0A%0D%0A%22That went well%2C%22 Henry Jekyll remarked from a fragment of reflective metal that jutted from the ground near where Hyde had come to rest.%0D%0A%0D%0AHyde%2C unperturbed%2C picked himself up and dusted fragments of brick from his sleeves.%0D%0A%0D%0A%22Give %27im time%2C %27Enry%2C%22 he replied equably. %22Early days yet.%22%0D%0A%0D%0ASo saying%2C he set off to follow the Hulk and make sure he didn%27t leave the proving ground.%0D%0A%0D%0A%5Bhr%5D%0D%0A%0D%0ADays went by%2C then weeks%2C as Banner and the Hulk worked separately along their parallel tracks. Each %22woke%22 to find messages left by the other%2C at first rebarbative%2C later more civil%2C eventually even conciliatory. Banner found himself waking next to the mountain house%27s owner again on a more or less regular basis%2C and after the first few times he wasn%27t even taken aback by it any more%2C particularly after one morning%27s voice mail message from his other%3A%0D%0A%0D%0A%22Uh... right. This Hulk. Listen. Um... Hulk really like Betty. Hulk think him and Betty might have a... uh... thing.%22 %28Long pause.%29 %22Puny Banner not screw this up for Hulk%2C OK%3F%22%0D%0A%0D%0AAt first he felt more than a little odd at the realization that the Hulk was apparently developing a %5Bi%5Dsocial life%5B%2Fi%5D during his time at large%2C but he supposed it beat waking up to find that he%27d wrecked a town and had half the army hunting for him. Just so long as he didn%27t wake one morning to find that his alter ego and the towering red warrior woman had had some kind of falling out while he was %22away%22.%0D%0A%0D%0ATruth to tell%2C Banner found that he rather liked Betty himself. Not in that way - his sense of self-preservation%2C if nothing else%2C intervened there - but she was fun-loving and unpretentious%2C easy to talk to%2C and not at all self-conscious about the fact that she was in the habit of waking up next to a man who%2C for most of her apparent boyfriend%27s %22life%22%2C had been his most hated enemy. She didn%27t go into any details about what her relationship with the Hulk might %5Bi%5Dentail%5B%2Fi%5D%2C for which Banner was grateful%2C but she was otherwise an excellent source of information about what the other side of Banner%27s being was %5Bi%5Dlike%5B%2Fi%5D - as was Hyde%2C with whom the Hulk had apparently become drinking buddies after their initial fight.%0D%0A%0D%0AThis was almost as eye-opening as the voice mails. He would never have thought%2C for instance%2C that the Hulk had anything approaching a sense of humor%2C nor a sense of childlike wonder%2C but according to Betty and Hyde%2C he had both. In fact%2C %22childlike%22 was the adjective that most often emerged when they talked about the Hulk.%0D%0A%0D%0AOne day%2C over their morning coffee%2C Betty remarked%2C %22The Hulk has decided that he ought to have a proper name.%22%0D%0A%0D%0ABanner nearly choked on his coffee%2C recovered himself%2C and said%2C %22I%27m sorry%3F%22%0D%0A%0D%0A%22For when you go home again%2C%22 she clarified. %22He%27s going to need his own identity documents and whatnot%2C as an agent of the IPO%2C and he doesn%27t think %27The Hulk%27 works as an official name. I mean%2C it%27s his Name%2C%22 she said%2C somehow contriving to pronounce the capital letter%2C %22but... %22 She shrugged. %22He%27s funny about that kind of thing. It%27s like he figures having a Real Grown-Up Name is an important part of his... you know%2C becoming an actual person%2C as opposed to some kind of monster people run away from.%22%0D%0A%0D%0ABanner stared at her. %22That%27s pretty deep for him%2C%22 he remarked.%0D%0A%0D%0ABetty chuckled. %22After all you%27ve learned in the last few months%2C you still underestimate him%2C%22 she said%2C shaking her head. %22He%27s not %5Bi%5Dstupid%5B%2Fi%5D. He%27s just... %22 She paused%2C thinking. %22Well%2C in Midgard it%27s usually used to %5Bi%5Dmean%5B%2Fi%5D stupid%2C but in Jotunheim we would call him a simple soul. You%27d probably use a bigger word. %27Uncomplicated%27%2C maybe.%22%0D%0A%0D%0ABanner nodded. %22I understand. It does surprise me - it surprises me every time I%27m reminded that he%27s more than I used to think he was. It takes a lot of getting used to%2C the idea that he%27s... not just a monster.%22%0D%0A%0D%0A%22Well%2C when you %5Bi%5Ddo%5B%2Fi%5D finally grasp that%2C on an instinctive as opposed to intellectual level... I think that%27s how you%27ll know you%27re ready.%22%0D%0A%0D%0A%22You%27ll miss him when we go%2C won%27t you%3F%22 Banner asked.%0D%0A%0D%0A%22Of course I%27ll miss him%2C%22 Betty replied without hesitation. %22I love him.%22%0D%0A%0D%0ABanner blinked. %22Uh. OK. I didn%27t realize you were that serious.%22%0D%0A%0D%0ABetty smirked. %22After all you%27ve learned in the last few months%2C you still underestimate him%2C%22 she said again.%0D%0A%0D%0AWhile Banner mulled that over%2C there was a knock at the front door%3B a moment later keys jingled%2C and then Mr. Hyde rounded the corner from the foyer%2C dressed for an outing%2C complete with a giant top hat perched on his huge%2C bewhiskered head.%0D%0A%0D%0A%22Mornin%27%2C sport%2C%22 he said. %22Big day today%21%22%0D%0A%0D%0A%22Is it%3F%22 Banner asked. %22Why%3F%22%0D%0A%0D%0A%22%27Er Ladyship%2C%22 said Hyde%2C by which Banner now knew he always meant Skuld%2C %22%27as decided in %27er infinite wisdom that you should %27ave a day out.%22%0D%0A%0D%0A%22A day out%3F Where%3F%22%0D%0A%0D%0A%22Well%2C%22 said Betty with a smile%2C %22you%27ve seen where I live... I thought I might show you where I came from.%22%0D%0A%0D%0A%5Bhr%5D%0D%0A%0D%0AAwakening slowly%2C Bruce Banner felt at the back of his head to make sure it wasn%27t spongy and remarked to himself that he%27d had pleasanter days.%0D%0A%0D%0AIt had started off promisingly enough%3B Skitha%2C a middling-sized walled port city on a broad river near Vanaheim%27s eastern border with Jotunheim%2C was a lovely%2C friendly place with a lot of history and character%2C like something out of a storybook %28or possibly a particularly well-illustrated %5Bi%5DDungeons %26 Dragons%5B%2Fi%5D sourcebook%29. The little cafe on the plaza overlooking the river docks had really good sausages. Betty had been in the process of telling him how%2C back in the bad old days%2C the city had been the first stop on any Jotun army%27s road to Asgard%27s Southwall... %0D%0A%0D%0A... when one had%2C improbably enough%2C shown up.%0D%0A%0D%0ANow Banner came to with a throbbing head to find himself stretched out on the cobbled ground next to what remained of their table. After verifying that his skull was intact%2C he gingerly raised his head and looked around. While he was out%2C the attacking force - mostly large but not giant%2C dull-grey-green%2C warty creatures in black nylon tactical gear - had secured the square with a military precision that struck Banner as strangely comical in what he guessed%2C based on war stories he%27d heard from Betty%2C were ogres or trolls. And thinking of Betty -%0D%0A%0D%0A%22Easy%2C Bruce%2C%22 she murmured%2C kneeling alongside him. %22Just stay down. It%27s not you they%27re after.%22%0D%0A%0D%0AThen%2C rising%2C she stepped around what the wreckage of the table and demanded in a ringing voice%2C %22Well%3F What are you waiting for%3F Let%27s get this over with%21%22%0D%0A%0D%0AThe rank of ogres sealing off the side of the square facing the river docks parted in well-drilled order%2C and up from the rear came a towering figure in what%2C to Banner%27s unpracticed eye%2C looked like an officer%27s uniform - gold-chased leather armor with an iron-strapped wooden buckler strapped to his left forearm. He must have stood 15 feet tall at least%2C more than half again as tall as his ogre subordinates. At his side he wore a massive pistol%2C and opposite it a sabre longer than Betty was tall. He had a bushy black beard drawn into a heavy plait with an iron weight the size of a man%27s head hanging at the end%2C and his skin was a dull brick red. His eyes%2C like Betty%27s%2C were yellow and glowed faintly.%0D%0A%0D%0A%22People of Skitha%2C%22 the giant boomed. %22Give my men no reason to make war upon you and they will not. We have no interest in the affairs of Vanaheim this day.%22 Then%2C pointing at Betty%2C he added%2C %22But by order of King Elding Grimmuryfirvaraskegg of Eldgard%2C the outcast must return with us%21%22%0D%0A%0D%0ABetty snorted. %22Excuse me%3F%22 she demanded indignantly. %22You guys abandoned me to die as a baby and now I%27m supposed to go %5Bi%5Dback%5B%2Fi%5D with you%3F I don%27t THINK - %22 %0D%0A%0D%0AShe was interrupted by one of the larger ogres%2C who stepped forward with a speed and fluidity not suggested by his ungainly frame and clobbered her in the back of the head with the butt of his rifle%2C dropping her to her knees. %22Do not speak to Colonel Hargrim%2C outcast.%22%0D%0A%0D%0ASeeing his friend thus abused%2C and the grins and laughs of the other ogres at the sight of it%2C sparked a familiar feeling in Banner - that sense of tightened skin and surging blood%2C of energies too vast for his frail body to contain. His fists knotting%2C he pushed himself up to hands and knees%2C then rose to his feet.%0D%0A%0D%0A%22You shouldn%27t have done that%2C%22 he said through his teeth. %22You%27ve made a friend of mine very angry.%22%0D%0A%0D%0AHargrim made a great show of squinting to see who was addressing him%2C then laughed. %22Hah%21 What business is it of yours%2C mortal%3F%22 Gesturing to the stunned Valkyrie%2C he added with a sneer%2C %22Even a runt like Princess B%C3%A8thildr is clearly far too much woman for the likes of %5Bi%5Dyou.%5B%2Fi%5D%22%0D%0A%0D%0AHis whole body quivering with the effort of controlling himself%2C Banner said in a deceptively calm tone of voice%2C %22As an officer of the International Police Organization%2C I%27m obliged to warn you %5Bi%5Donce%5B%2Fi%5D. You%27re making a big mistake.%22%0D%0A%0D%0AHargrim snorted. %22Sergeant%2C dispose of this insect. Its buzzing annoys me.%22%0D%0A%0D%0A%22Sir%2C%22 said the ogre who%27d hit Betty. He took a step forward%2C slinging his rifle to free his hands for a more personal touch. Right on schedule came the lightness in Banner%27s head%2C as what he now recognized as the Hulk%27s consciousness lunged forward into his own%2C furious%2C undeniable%2C raging for release.%0D%0A%0D%0AFor the first time in his life%2C Robert Bruce Banner embraced that sensation with all his heart.%0D%0A%0D%0A%5Bi%5DThey%27re all yours%2C big guy%2C%5B%2Fi%5D he thought.%0D%0A%0D%0A%5Bi%5DThank you%2C Banner%2C%5B%2Fi%5D the Hulk%27s voice replied. %5Bi%5DHulk going to enjoy this.%5B%2Fi%5D%0D%0A%0D%0ABanner had only a moment to consider how odd it was not to be %22puny Banner%22 to the Hulk before everything went blank for him.%0D%0A%0D%0ASergeant Garkk was never entirely sure what happened next. As Garkk approached him%2C the scrawny human suddenly threw his head back and roared like a wounded animal%2C and by the time he%27d %5Bi%5Dfinished%5B%2Fi%5D roaring%2C he was... someone else. Someone a lot bigger. Someone whose first punch knocked Sergeant Garkk - no joke%2C later confirmed by the regimental surveyors - twelve and one-quarter miles back toward Jotunheim.%0D%0A%0D%0AThe other ogres recoiled in horror - what had just happened had a flavor of shape-shifters about it%2C and while not as hung up about that kind of thing as trolls%2C they couldn%27t be said to like it - before their military discipline took over and they rushed in. Whatever the human had become%2C he was still smaller - or at least shorter - than an ogre. With their numbers and their armor%2C Garkk%27s startling fate notwithstanding%2C they figured he couldn%27t possibly stand against them all.%0D%0A%0D%0AThey were wrong about that%2C but at least they didn%27t get quite as much air as their sergeant.%0D%0A%0D%0AWhile Hargrim bellowed for reinforcements%2C the Hulk burst free of the melee with a roar%2C scattering ogres in all directions%2C and sprang to Betty%27s side. She got to her feet%2C shaking her head.%0D%0A%0D%0A%22I%27m OK%2C%22 she said%3B then%2C with a wry little grin%2C she added%2C %22I%27ve got a pretty hard head.%22%0D%0A%0D%0A%22Who your friend%3F%22 the Hulk asked as she unslung her shield from her back and then went more or less back-to-back with him.%0D%0A%0D%0A%22He%27s no friend of %5Bi%5Dmine%2C%5B%2Fi%5D%22 Betty told him. %22His name%27s Hargrim.%22 She unclipped her Valkyrie power hammer from her belt and thumbed it on%3B its gravity concentrator filled the square with a low%2C ominous hum. %22He%27s my father%27s right-hand man.%22%0D%0A%0D%0AThe Hulk grunted%2C unimpressed. %22Not for long%2C%22 he said.%0D%0A%0D%0ABetty glanced back over her shoulder at him%2C met his eye%2C and grinned%3B then she went one way%2C he went the other%2C and the fight was on.%0D%0A%0D%0A%5Bcenter%5D%2F%2A Quiet Riot%0D%0A%22Bang Your Head %28Metal Health%29%22%0D%0A%5Bi%5DMetal Health%5B%2Fi%5D %281983%29 %2A%2F%5B%2Fcenter%5D%0D%0A%0D%0ASome of Hargrim%27s troops%2C seeing the fearsome power of the Hulk%2C mistakenly believed that they were better off taking their chances with Betty. It soon became apparent to those still conscious%2C though%2C that the only way to really come out ahead in %5Bi%5Dthis%5B%2Fi%5D battle was just to stay the hell %5Bi%5Dout%5B%2Fi%5D of it. The Hulk%27s strength and savage fury were terrifying to behold as he reduced the left flank of Hargrim%27s army to rubble - but the alternative was a fully trained%2C no longer surprised Valkyrie. B%C3%A8thildr Forgeheart might have been a runt by Eldjotun standards%2C but she was skilled far beyond the ogreish rabble of Hargrim%27s mercenaries%2C and there was more than enough power in her seven-foot scarlet frame to make any of them regret putting himself in her way - particularly with a power hammer in her hand.%0D%0A%0D%0ASeeing his army crumbling before the twin onslaught%2C Hargrim knew the time had come to cut his losses. Without hesitation or qualm%2C he ordered his reserve into the breach%2C knowing that they could not possibly win. Against just the outcast%2C they could have prevailed with relative ease. The... %5Bi%5Dgreen%5B%2Fi%5D creature... changed things.%0D%0A%0D%0AFortunately%2C Hargrim and his liege lord were the sort who planned for this kind of contingency. He had a backup plan of his own in play. Now%2C as his reserve bought him time%2C he set it in motion.%0D%0A%0D%0AThe Hulk saw the giant touch his belt and then vanish in a flash of silvery light%3B out of the corner of his eye%2C he saw a similar flash up at the top of the hill that dominated the center of town%2C within the walls of Skitha Castle. He didn%27t know %5Bi%5Dwhy%5B%2Fi%5D Hargrim had teleported himself to the castle%2C but he was certain it couldn%27t possibly be anything good. With a furious roar%2C he threw off the latest platoon of ogres who had tried to bring him down%2C turned toward the castle%2C and gathered himself to leap in pursuit of his main foe.%0D%0A%0D%0A%22Now%21 Bring the monster down%21%22 an ogre NCO shouted. From the edge of the plaza%2C one of the reserve squads unlimbered some sort of shoulder-fired anti-armor weapon%2C drew a bead%2C and launched a rocket designed to destroy the tanks of Asgard at the Hulk.%0D%0A%0D%0AIn response%2C the Hulk turned to face the oncoming missile head-on and brought his huge hands flat together in front of him. The shockwave slammed out at the speed of sound%2C flattening everything in a radius of a half-dozen yards or so around him and detonating the rocket%27s warhead before it had a chance to come anywhere near him. The fireball washed back over the weapon and its crew%2C sending them scattering in dismay.%0D%0A%0D%0AThe Hulk paid them no mind%3B taking advantage of the momentary clear space the maneuver had bought him%2C he turned back toward the castle. It stood perhaps a mile and a half away%2C not including the vertical distance from the riverbank to the hilltop. The Hulk cleared it easily in a single furious bound%2C shattering the paving stones of the castle courtyard with the impact of his arrival.%0D%0A%0D%0ANot that this would really lower the property values of the courtyard significantly%3B it was already littered with broken equipment%2C unconscious or dead Skitha city guardsmen%2C and a roughly equal number of the ogre heavy infantry who had taken the outer castle in spite of their furious resistance. The remains of the attacking force%2C now massed near the huge and still-sealed great doors%2C turned in surprise at the crash of the Hulk%27s landing.%0D%0A%0D%0A%22You%27re too late%2C whatever you are%2C%22 Hargrim boomed from behind his troops. He gestured to a strange%2C carapaced object about the size of a car%2C which stood on six black iron legs in front of the castle door. %22The Inferno Conduit is set and counting down. In five minutes this whole valley will be a smoking crater.%22%0D%0A%0D%0A%22Hulk not let you do this%21%22 the Hulk replied.%0D%0A%0D%0AHargrim laughed. %22It%27s %5Bi%5Ddone%2C%5B%2Fi%5D my stupid friend%2C%22 he replied mockingly. %22If you%27ve even the %5Bi%5Dsmallest%5B%2Fi%5D spark in that skull of yours%2C you%27ll make your escape while you have the chance and leave Skitha to its fate. As for me%2C I have no time to waste bandying words with you. I have work to do.%22%0D%0A%0D%0ASo saying%2C he touched his belt again and vanished once more in a flash of light.%0D%0A%0D%0AThe Hulk stood gazing at the four dozen or so ogre soldiers standing between him and the Inferno Device. They stared back at him%2C fingering their weapons. Bigger and tougher than the ones in the square%2C these were Hargrim%27s elite shock troops%2C the ones he entrusted with the really heavy lifting in these operations. They weren%27t intimidated by one nearly-ogre-sized green human in what appeared to be tight-fitting black cargo shorts%2C even if he %5Bi%5Dhad%5B%2Fi%5D just arrived in the courtyard from above like a bomb.%0D%0A%0D%0ATheir mistake.%0D%0A%0D%0ATwo minutes and forty-four seconds later%2C the nine remaining ogre elites fled the courtyard%2C screaming in terror that the monster could not be killed. The Hulk pulled one of their spears from his shoulder with a grunt and cast it aside%2C then stalked through the scattered forms of their colleagues toward the Inferno Device. The wound had gone by the time he reached the machine.%0D%0A%0D%0AContrary to popular assumption back in the days following his first appearances%2C the Hulk %5Bi%5Dcould%5B%2Fi%5D read%3B but he couldn%27t read the digits on what he assumed to be the countdown timer%2C having no familiarity whatever with Jotun numerals. Nor did the complicated inner workings of the device%2C once he had torn off its outer carapace%2C mean even the slighest thing to him.%0D%0A%0D%0AOnce%2C his response to this frustrating turn of events would have been to %5Bi%5Dsmash%5B%2Fi%5D. Now%2C after weeks of battle%2C boozing%2C and war stories among the %5Bi%5DEinherjar%5B%2Fi%5D of Valhalla%2C it occurred to him that this would probably just set the thing off%2C which would be catastrophic%2C if not for him%2C certainly for Skitha.%0D%0A%0D%0A%22This above Hulk%27s pay grade%2C%22 he muttered%2C using a phrase he%27d picked up from one of Betty%27s colleagues... %0D%0A%0D%0A... and then he did something he had never%2C ever done before%2C and willingly relinquished control. %5Bi%5DThis your department%2C science man%2C%5B%2Fi%5D he remarked as his consciousness and Banner%27s %22passed%22 each other.%0D%0A%0D%0ABruce Banner blinked in surprise. He wasn%27t conscious%2C properly speaking%2C when the Hulk was%2C but that moment of transition had provided enough of a situational update that he wasn%27t completely confused%2C as had always been the case upon waking after one of the Hulk%27s rampages in the past - and%2C he noted with satisfaction%2C the new pants worked too. It was a refreshing change not to have to hold up the tattered remains of his dignity with one hand while taking stock of whatever mess the Hulk had left him with... %0D%0A%0D%0A... and%2C boy howdy%2C this was one for the books. If not for Henry Jekyll%27s training%2C the situation he now found himself in would have turned Banner right back into the Hulk. He %5Bi%5Dcould%5B%2Fi%5D read a bit of Jotun%2C having picked up some rudiments from a few books in Betty%27s house%2C and he%27d learned more than a little about the weapons technology of the Upper Realms from Skuld in his time. Enough to know that he was standing in front of a pickup-sized weapon of giantish mass destruction called an Inferno Conduit wearing nothing but a pair of magic cargo pants%2C and that in about two minutes it was going to open a temporary gateway to Muspelheim%27s Canyon of Eternal Fire.%0D%0A%0D%0AKnowing that%2C Banner%27s agile mind sussed out the rest of Hargrim%27s plan in a few moments. This would not pour forth a demonic army%2C because there wasn%27t one to be found down there%2C but it %5Bi%5Dwould%5B%2Fi%5D be similar to opening a door on the other side of which was the surface of the Sun. The whole Skitha Valley and everyone in it would be incinerated in an instant - everyone%2C presumably%2C but Hargrim and Betty%2C who as fire giants were largely indifferent to heat and flame.%0D%0A%0D%0A%5Bi%5DTalk about your sore losers%2C%5B%2Fi%5D Banner thought%2C and set about preventing it from doing that.%0D%0A%0D%0AThen%2C %5Bi%5DMemo to self%3A see about getting a magic shirt to go with the magic pants. Maybe even some shoes.%5B%2Fi%5D%0D%0A%0D%0A%5Bhr%5D%0D%0A%0D%0ABetty finished with the last of the ogres%2C then stood in the middle of the courtyard for a moment%2C catching her breath. She was bleeding from a dozen wounds%2C none of them really serious%2C but enough in the aggregate to slow her down considerably. Worse%2C her left arm had been broken by the same blow that shivered her shield%2C her power hammer%27s energy cells were flat%2C and she thought one of the beasts might have actually %5Bi%5Dbitten%5B%2Fi%5D her right calf%2C which now hurt to put weight on. Turning painfully toward the sound of sarcastic applause%2C she saw Hargrim standing where he%27d been at the start of all this%2C by the river gate.%0D%0A%0D%0A%22Your skill is impressive%2C runt%2C%22 he said. %22I may have to admit to your august father when I bring you home that he was right and I was wrong. I told him you would be of no use to his kingdom if he called you home now%2C but he insisted that Lady Skuld and the others would have taught you well%2C in spite of your heritage.%22 He grinned%2C yellowish teeth flashing at the junction of his moustache and beard. %22They really will teach %5Bi%5Danyone%5B%2Fi%5D their secrets in the Golden City%2C won%27t they%3F%22%0D%0A%0D%0ABetty discarded her spent power hammer%2C reached behind her with her good hand%2C and drew her backup weapon%2C an alloy cylinder that sprang out at the touch of a stud to form first a haft%2C then a double-bitted axe. %22Why don%27t you come over here%2C%22 she replied with an assurance she did not altogether feel%2C %22and I%27ll %5Bi%5Dshow%5B%2Fi%5D you what I%27ve learned.%22%0D%0A%0D%0A%22It%27ll be a pleasure to teach you some manners%2C%22 said Hargrim%2C drawing his sabre.%0D%0A%0D%0AThough more than twice her height%2C Hargrim moved with horrifying speed - particularly a problem now that Betty was wounded and near-exhausted - and his strength was shocking. She knew immediately that she could never hope to take him head-on in her present condition%2C and possibly not even at the peak of her form. Few even among her Valkyrie comrades could have hoped to stand against Colonel Hargrim in a head-on fight. Gudrun Truemace%2C maybe. She was only half-Jotun%2C but her giantish parent had been one of the frost giants of the Tindalos%2C the hardiest and mightiest of all the Jotun%2C and her strength was enormous%2C rumored to rival that of Thor Ironhammer himself. Or Kijana Whitestaff%2C but only in her natural form as one of the dragons of Alfheim.%0D%0A%0D%0AUnder normal circumstances%2C then%2C Betty would have concentrated on outmaneuvering Hargrim and chipping away at him%2C working him into a position where she could launch a single surgical strike that would remove him from the battle. She%27d have fought tactically%2C using every advantage she could find to its fullest advantage%2C and in the end she was confident she%27d have triumphed.%0D%0A%0D%0AToday%2C she didn%27t have much leverage - and even so%2C she %5Bi%5Dstill%5B%2Fi%5D managed to score one solid blow%2C shattering Hargrim%27s buckler and nearly toppling him over before he managed to recover and smash her to the ground with the remains of his shield. By the time she%27d recovered her wits from that blow%2C he had one enormous foot on her chest %28practically covering her entire torso%29 and the point of his sabre at her throat.%0D%0A%0D%0A%22Your father wants you alive%2C%22 he said%2C %22but he understands that accidents sometimes happen... %22%0D%0A%0D%0ABetty spat in his eye and sank her axe haft-deep in the side of his left boot. Hargrim recoiled%2C roaring%3B she tried to get up%2C but her left arm would do nothing and her right leg wasn%27t any too cooperative either. She reached to her right boot for her survival knife%2C reflecting ruefully on Gin Shepard%27s maxim that any day you lived to go to Plan C was still a good day%2C and watched with defiant eyes as Hargrim steadied himself%2C yanked her axe out of his leg%2C and tossed it contemptuously away.%0D%0A%0D%0ABefore he could make some snide remark and renew the offensive%2C though%2C a roaring green something plummeted out of the sky like a meteor and smashed him to the ground.%0D%0A%0D%0A%22Surprised to see Hulk%3F%22 the Hulk asked as he lifted the stunned giant and threw him against the courtyard wall.%0D%0A%0D%0A%22Fool%21%22 Hargrim snarled. %22Any moment now you%27ll burn with the rest of this miserable town.%22%0D%0A%0D%0A%22Hulk not think so%2C%22 the Hulk replied. He held up the device Banner%27s careful hands had teased from the inner workings of the Inferno Conduit%2C made sure Hargrim had recognized it%2C and then crushed it between his fingers and discarded it.%0D%0A%0D%0A%22Impossible%2C%22 Hargrim murmured. %22Impossible%21%22 He pulled himself upright%2C his huge fists closing. %22I don%27t know what you are%2C mortal%2C but I am still Colonel Fjalar Hargrim of the First Eldgard Legion%2C and I will %5Bi%5Dcrush you with my bare hands%21%5B%2Fi%5D%22%0D%0A%0D%0AThe Hulk grunted contemptuously. %22Bring it.%22%0D%0A%0D%0ABe fair to Hargrim%3A He brought it. In minutes the whole area%2C already in extreme disrepair from the small war fought there%2C was a disaster area - buildings wrecked%2C walls toppled%2C dockside cranes destroyed. In the end%2C Hargrim%27s armor hung in gold-trimmed tatters%2C his face bruised%2C his knuckles torn and bloody - but at last he had the upper hand. He had the Hulk backed against one of the few remaining walls on what had been the esplanade%2C one massive hand around his neck%2C crushing the life from him.%0D%0A%0D%0A%22I give you your due%2C mortal%2C%22 he said. %22You have fought like a Jotun this day. Hargrim will see that you are remembered in song.%22 Tightening his grip still further%2C he bore down and went on%2C %22Now die.%22%0D%0A%0D%0AThe Hulk%2C teeth gritted%2C said nothing%3B but the right jab the giant received to his midsection at that instant%2C delivered with no more room to travel than the length of the Hulk%27s forearm%2C would have caved in the glacis plate of a tank%2C which was a statement all its own. Hargrim grunted%2C blood gathering at the corner of his mouth%2C and the Hulk headbutted him full in the forehead%2C breaking his grip and sending him stumbling back.%0D%0A%0D%0A%22Hargrim think because he is %5Bi%5Dbigger%5B%2Fi%5D than Hulk%2C he is %5Bi%5Dstronger%5B%2Fi%5D than Hulk%2C%22 the Hulk snarled. He took a step forward%2C smacking aside an attempt at a counterblow. %22%5Bb%5DHargrim is %5Bi%5Dwrong%21%5B%2Fi%5D%5B%2Fb%5D%22 he roared%2C delivering a right cross that would have derailed a train. Then%2C bringing both fists up from below%2C he bellowed at the top of his voice%2C %0D%0A%0D%0A%5Bbig%5D%5Bb%5D%22%5Bi%5D%5Bu%5DNO ONE%5B%2Fu%5D IS STRONGER THAN HULK%21%5B%2Fi%5D%22%5B%2Fb%5D%5B%2Fbig%5D%0D%0A%0D%0AThe blow slammed Hargrim%27s jaw shut with enough force to splinter several of the giant%27s teeth%2C sending him up and over backward to crash down in a slumping heap amid the rubble of what had been a grain mill.%0D%0A%0D%0AStanding on the fallen giant%27s chest%2C the Hulk waited for Hargrim to regain a measure of consciousness%2C then leaned close to his battered face and said%2C %22Hulk let Hargrim live so he take message to Betty%27s father for Hulk. Tell him if he ever bother Betty again... Hulk do worse to him.%22%0D%0A%0D%0AFueled by one last surge of fury%2C Hargrim shoved the Hulk off his chest and rose from the rubble%2C brandishing a gleaming dagger drawn from a holster on his back. The Hulk ignored it%2C sprang forward%2C seized the the weight plaited into the giant%27s beard%2C and used it to fling him bodily across the river%2C where he completed the demolition of a dock damaged earlier in the day.%0D%0A%0D%0AThe Hulk considered leaping after him%2C but it was clear as Hargrim slowly%2C painfully dragged himself upright again that the giant had had enough. Blood streamed down his chest%2C droplets of it sending up curls of steam as they fell into the river. The Hulk looked down and saw that he was still holding the iron weight - and%2C indeed%2C most of Hargrim%27s beard.%0D%0A%0D%0A%22Hulk keep this%2C%22 he declared%2C then added%3A %22Tell your king%21 He stay away from Betty - or Hulk smash%21%22%0D%0A%0D%0AHargrim stood unsteadily for a few moments%2C knee-deep in the river%2C his face a mask of blood%2C broken teeth%2C and slightly unfocused%2C hate-filled eyes.%0D%0A%0D%0AThen he touched his belt again and was gone.%0D%0A%0D%0AThe Hulk looked back up to the hill%2C but there was no answering flash. Hargrim had quit the field entirely. Grunting with satisfaction%2C he turned and went to see if he could help Betty.%0D%0A%0D%0A%22I%27ll be OK%2C%22 she told him%2C using his shoulder as a brace to get gingerly to her feet. %22I know people.%22 Looking around at the ruins of the riverfront district as city guard reinforcements began to arrive%2C she raked her tangled black hair back from her face with her good hand and sighed. %22Man. You guys did a number on this place.%22%0D%0A%0D%0A%22People still alive. Town can be fixed%2C%22 the Hulk replied philosophically.%0D%0A%0D%0ABetty chuckled. %22Yeah%2C true that%2C%22 she said. It took her a few moments to realize what the odd trophy in the Hulk%27s hand was%3B then she said incredulously%2C %22Is that Hargrim%27s %5Bi%5Dbeard%3F%5B%2Fi%5D%22%0D%0A%0D%0AThe Hulk nodded. %22Uh-huh.%22%0D%0A%0D%0AShe burst out laughing%2C leaning against his shoulder to keep from falling as the laughter wracked her battered form. There were tears%2C not entirely of pain%2C in her eyes when she finally wound down with a gasped%2C %22Oh%2C oh man. Wow. That%27s all... facial hair is a %5Bi%5Dthing%5B%2Fi%5D in Jotun culture. You didn%27t just beat the ever-loving %5Bi%5Dcrap%5B%2Fi%5D out of him%2C you %5Bi%5Dritually emasculated%5B%2Fi%5D him.%22%0D%0A%0D%0A%22Hulk not know what that means%2C%22 the Hulk said%2C %22but it sound mean.%22%0D%0A%0D%0ABetty wiped at her eyes. %22Oh yeah. Aw%2C man. I said it before and I%27ll say it again%2C dude%3A You are an %5Bi%5Dartist%5B%2Fi%5D.%22 Then she leaned and kissed him. %22My big green sultan of smash.%22%0D%0A%0D%0AThe Hulk didn%27t quite seem to know what to say to that%2C so he said nothing%3B just smiled a little.%0D%0A%0D%0A%22Seriously%2C you saved my perky red ass today%2C%22 she said. %22%5Bi%5DAnd%5B%2Fi%5D my hometown%2C though it got a little beat up.%22%0D%0A%0D%0AThe Hulk regarded her with that same little smile for a second%2C then said something she wouldn%27t have expected from him at the beginning of their friendship%3A%0D%0A%0D%0A%22Hulk not do it alone.%22%0D%0A%0D%0A%5Bhr%5D%0D%0A%0D%0A%5Bb%5DMonday%2C April 26%2C 2410%0D%0AHigh-Energy Phenomena Laboratory%0D%0ASublevel G%2C International Police Headquarters%0D%0ANew Avalon%2C Zeta Cygni%5B%2Fb%5D%0D%0A%0D%0ACaitlin Fairchild was in the HEP Lab lobby%2C chatting with Calhoun as she emptied her mailbox%2C when the elevator arrived and Dr. Banner breezed in%2C looking... well... like he%27d had a hell of a good vacation%2C wherever he%27d been.%0D%0A%0D%0A%22Good morning%2C Agent Calhoun%2C%22 he said cheerfully. %22Great weather we%27re having%2C isn%27t it%3F Did you have a good weekend%3F%22%0D%0A%0D%0A%22Uh... %22 Barney blinked for a second at the lab%27s director%2C who was dressed casually under his lab coat and seemed to have picked up a tan somewhere. He didn%27t just look %5Bi%5Dhappier%5B%2Fi%5D than either Barney or Fairchild had ever seen him before%2C he looked %5Bi%5Dhealthier%5B%2Fi%5D. Like he%27d been eating right and getting enough sleep. He wasn%27t even wearing his glasses.%0D%0A%0D%0AThen the guard caught himself and said%2C %22Y... yeah%2C it sure is. Great weather%2C I mean. My weekend was OK%2C did a little fishin%27 up on the Oxbow... %22%0D%0A%0D%0A%22I should try that sometime%2C%22 Banner said. %22I hear it%27s relaxing. Oh%2C hey%2C Barney%2C when you get a minute%2C can you chase down an address for Mark Irving for me%3F I have to apologize and beg him to come back to work. Good morning%2C Dr. Fairchild%2C%22 he went seamlessly on. %22You look different. Did you change your hair%3F%22%0D%0A%0D%0AThen%2C without waiting for a response%2C he went off down the hall%2C cheerfully humming an old pop song. Fairchild and Barney stared at each other for a couple of seconds%2C both wondering whether Banner had been being facetious - pretty much unheard-of - or genuinely hadn%27t %5Bi%5Dregistered%5B%2Fi%5D that his mousy colleague was 18 inches taller and about a hundred pounds more athletic than she%27d been when he had last seen her.%0D%0A%0D%0ABarney said it first%3A%0D%0A%0D%0A%22%5Bi%5DWhat side%5B%2Fi%5D of %5Bi%5Dwhose bed%5B%2Fi%5D did he wake up on this morning%3F%22%0D%0A%0D%0A%22I don%27t know%2C%22 Fairchild said%3B then%2C after a moment%27s thought%2C she added judiciously%2C %22but we should give her a medal.%22%0D%0A%0D%0A%5Bi%5D%22The Balance%22 - a Future Imperfect mini-story by Benjamin D. Hutchins%0D%0Awith Geoff Depew %26 Chad Collier%0D%0Aspecial to the Eyrie Productions Discussion Forum%0D%0A%C2%A9 2011 Eyrie Productions%2C Unlimited%5B%2Fi%5D. ""
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version 3.3 © 2001
Eyrie Productions,
Unlimited
Benjamin
D. Hutchins
E P U (Colour)
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RE: FI Mini: The Balance
RE: FI Mini: The Balance
