In real life, fighter pilots tend to have massive egos, and this is generally a good thing, because it's a job that requires massive, unwavering self-confidence in order to succeed. Piloting a machine like the Evas would very much fall in the same category. Now, maybe Gendo needs a doormat to make Instrumentality happen, but they won't get to that point if Eva's pilot doesn't have the balls to go out and win. Shinji is not sufficient to the task at hand (which, granted, the show admits with the way things go in the end).

"This is probably a stupid question, but . . ."