"Pile."

"So Your Father's New Armada Of Battle Vixens Have An Aversion To Trousers"

"Pile."

"So You're Technically The Bastard Offspring Of A French Nobleman Depending On How Marital Succession Works"

"Deeeefinitely pile."

"Corwin, why do you even have any of these?"

"I'm the firstborn son of an immortal sword-saint and a lady from Viking myths as filtered through anime. You, on the other hand, are a nobly-empowered princess from a pocket dimension whose power involves pulling a sword out of your wife. If I see a book about dealing with weird stuff? I buy. That. Book."

"... You know, when you spell it all out like that, our lives are kinda nuts."

"I know, right?"

(with apologies to the authors. =] )

---
"She's old, she's lame, she's barren too, // "She's not worth feed or hay, // "But I'll give her this," - he blew smoke at me - // "She was something in her day." -- Garnet Rogers, Small Victory

FiMFiction.net: we might accept blatant porn involving the cast of My Little Pony but as God is my witness we have standards.

"So You're In A Polyamorous Relationship With Multiple People Who Could Kick Your Butt From Here To Next Tuesday, But In A Hot Way."

"Oh yeah, Anthy got me that one."