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Subject: "Manhunt: Part 2" Archived thread - Read only
 
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Verbena
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1107 posts
May-24-09, 10:44 PM (EDT)
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"Manhunt: Part 2"
 
   Well! Things are starting to come together, but what I like more than anything else is seeing some of the characters I only vaguely remember (or were vaguely defined) in previous material getting a little bit more fleshed out. Like Vanessa Leeds, or many of the other crew from Secrets. One of the pleasures of this series is seeing how everything comes together. I don't always agree with every design decision, mind, but I devour each new text-based morsel with relish.


"They say one should not speak unkindly of the dead, so I say, 'nice try'." --Lezard


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  Subject     Author     Message Date     ID  
  RE: Manhunt: Part 2 Offsides May-24-09 1
     RE: Manhunt: Part 2 Gryphonadmin May-24-09 2
         RE: Manhunt: Part 2 Offsides May-25-09 5
  RE: Manhunt: Part 2 Mister Fnord May-24-09 3
     RE: Manhunt: Part 2 BZArchermoderator May-25-09 4
  RE: Manhunt: Part 2 Matrix Dragon May-25-09 6
     RE: Manhunt: Part 2 hydra12 May-25-09 8
     RE: Manhunt: Part 2 WyrdDragon May-25-09 9
         RE: Manhunt: Part 2 Star Ranger4 May-25-09 15
     RE: Manhunt: Part 2 Gryphonadmin May-25-09 10
         RE: Manhunt: Part 2 CdrMike May-25-09 16

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Offsides
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1264 posts
May-24-09, 11:01 PM (EDT)
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1. "RE: Manhunt: Part 2"
In response to message #0
 
   Definitely an interesting set-up - I'm looking forward to seeing where this goes.

Also, I notice that the name of Part 2 changed, and Part 3 is now named what Part 2 was originally named. Did the story itself expand as you wrote it, or did you just decide to break it up differently?

Either way, this has a lot of good potential. Can't wait for the next instalment!

Offsides

[...] in order to be a realist you must believe in miracles.
-- David Ben Gurion
EPU RCW #π
#include <stdsig.h>


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Gryphonadmin
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May-24-09, 11:09 PM (EDT)
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2. "RE: Manhunt: Part 2"
In response to message #1
 
   LAST EDITED ON May-25-09 AT 03:42 PM (EDT)
 
>Also, I notice that the name of Part 2 changed, and Part 3 is now
>named what Part 2 was originally named. Did the story itself expand
>as you wrote it, or did you just decide to break it up differently?

There was some expansion, but most of it was that bits got re-ordered. For instance, the Captain-Pummelling Day scene was originally -after- what is now the firstsecond scene in part 3. To preserve something like parity in episode lengths, that bit - which is where the title part 2 originally had comes from - got shuffled into the next part, and it took the title with it.

--G.
-><-
Benjamin D. Hutchins, Co-Founder, Editor-in-Chief, & Forum Admin
Eyrie Productions, Unlimited http://www.eyrie-productions.com/
Ceterum censeo Carthaginem esse delendam.


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Offsides
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1264 posts
May-25-09, 08:35 AM (EDT)
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5. "RE: Manhunt: Part 2"
In response to message #2
 
   >There was some expansion, but most of it was that bits got re-ordered.
> For instance, the Captain-Pummelling Day scene was originally -after-
>what is now the first scene in part 3. To preserve something like
>parity in episode lengths, that bit - which is where the title part 2
>originally had comes from - got shuffled into the next part, and it
>took the title with it.
>
Gotcha - that makes perfect sense. Thanks for the info!

Offsides

[...#&93; in order to be a realist you must believe in miracles.
-- David Ben Gurion
EPU RCW #π
#include <stdsig.h>


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Mister Fnord
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294 posts
May-24-09, 11:19 PM (EDT)
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3. "RE: Manhunt: Part 2"
In response to message #0
 
   Things We Learned This Episode:

* Whoever took out the Invincible wasn't Kei but someone - or a collection of someones - related to Gryphon's Trek adventure. Probably involving Valeris; the Cartwright/Chang conspiracy rides again?

* A mysterious person in a D-series battlemover attacking people at night? I know this music...

* Now we know who the message was for. Sending a telegram to the right people.

All in all a decent part 2, hopefully part 3 will start bringing some of these threads together.

--
Mr. Fnord


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BZArchermoderator
Member since Nov-9-05
1783 posts
May-25-09, 01:14 AM (EDT)
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4. "RE: Manhunt: Part 2"
In response to message #3
 
   >Things We Learned This Episode:
>
>* Whoever took out the Invincible wasn't Kei but someone - or a
>collection of someones - related to Gryphon's Trek adventure. Probably
>involving Valeris; the Cartwright/Chang conspiracy rides again?
>

If Valeris had taken part in the attack, I don't see G. trusting her to do squat. On the other hand, when Saavik mentions that one of the attackers nearly destroyed the Federation singlehandedly...I wonder if the gun in act one might be named James Cook Styles...

---------------------------
Jaymie "BZArcher" Wagner
She/They
@BZArcher / bzarcher at gmail
"Life is change. Let’s live.”


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Matrix Dragon
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1893 posts
May-25-09, 09:00 AM (EDT)
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6. "RE: Manhunt: Part 2"
In response to message #0
 
   >"Spock?"
>"Yes, Benjamin."
>"Who -did- put the bomp in the bomp ba bomp ba bomp?"
>The question made next to no sense to Saavik - she had no idea
>what any of the nouns were - but she trusted Spock's answer would
>illuminate the matter for her.
>In this, she was to be let down, for, after a moment's grave
>consideration, Spock replied (still without turning from his work), "I
>do not know, but it is logical to surmise that the same individual put
>the ram in the rama lama ding dong."

That killed me, completely and utterly. Everything else was brilliantly interesting (Grissoms rouge robot jockey, the mystery of Valeris, the Fallout 3 sensation I got from the Invincible crews new base of operations), and I can't wait for more.

I mean, I know this story ends with G beating the Butcher and clearing his name, but how he does it has me more and more curious by the minute.

Great run so far, and I'm betting that the visitors to the school were the Sterlings, and I'm hoping to see Miria get the chance to chew him out over running off at Sonset :)

Matrix Dragon, J. Random Nutter


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hydra12
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May-25-09, 10:27 AM (EDT)
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8. "RE: Manhunt: Part 2"
In response to message #6
 
   That was BY FAR my favorite part, although I really liked Captain-Pummelling Day and Taco Night, too.

hydra12


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WyrdDragon
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May-25-09, 12:41 PM (EDT)
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9. "RE: Manhunt: Part 2"
In response to message #6
 
   If memory serves, there's a mini-story where the Sterling sisters go to the school - but that could just be my brain playing tricks on me.


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Star Ranger4
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2483 posts
May-25-09, 05:40 PM (EDT)
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15. "RE: Manhunt: Part 2"
In response to message #9
 
   >If memory serves, there's a mini-story where the Sterling sisters go
>to the school - but that could just be my brain playing tricks on me.

If there is, its somewhere else other than the mini stories forum. Closest I can find is in the last scene of Reunion, where Max and Miria tell Maia and Miranda:

"The Nazgl have to find the answers to what really happened in Musashi City that day."

Which reminds me G... Did your muse ever whisper in your ear about just what happened with Mir and Maia finally linked up with Mr. Bernard????

Of COURSE you wernt
expecting it!
No One expects the
FANNISH INQUISITION!

RCW# 86


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Gryphonadmin
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22374 posts
May-25-09, 03:45 PM (EDT)
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10. "RE: Manhunt: Part 2"
In response to message #6
 
   >the Fallout 3 sensation I got from the Invincible crews new
>base of operations)

Musashi does have something of the look and feel of the Capital Wasteland, doesn't it? The primary inspiration for Socko Soda was the bottling plant in last year's The Incredible Hulk (which reminds me that I forgot to credit Janice as location scout - it was her suggestion), but the post-apocalyptic nature of Musashi in that era does lend itself well to the Fallout vibe, especially with the radioactive ruin hotspots and whatnot. The Socko Soda facility wasn't overrun with deranged antique security robots, though. :)

--G.
-><-
Benjamin D. Hutchins, Co-Founder, Editor-in-Chief, & Forum Admin
Eyrie Productions, Unlimited http://www.eyrie-productions.com/
Ceterum censeo Carthaginem esse delendam.


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CdrMike
Member since Feb-20-05
889 posts
May-25-09, 06:28 PM (EDT)
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16. "RE: Manhunt: Part 2"
In response to message #10
 
   >>the Fallout 3 sensation I got from the Invincible crews new
>>base of operations)
>
>Musashi does have something of the look and feel of the Capital
>Waste

--------------------------
CdrMike, Overwatch Reject

"You know, the world could always use more heroes." - Tracer, Overwatch


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