You have Super Secret Triple-Encrypted Batmail!
From: "The Goddamn Batman" <batman_beyond!bativac.batcave.kw>
To: "Robin, the Boy Wonder" <robin!titans.ipo.zc>
Cc: "Batgirl" <batgirl!titans.ipo.zc>
Date: Mon Jul 05 2410 22:31:19 -0500 (AST)
What-ho, Avalon County branch,
Tim, If you don't mind a little unsolicited advice, I think it's probably time you reset your $NAME variable. You're what, nearly 19 now? Billing yourself as The Boy Wonder is going to be officially creepy soon, though not as creepy was when Dick was 20ish and still wearing the pixie shorts and Peter Pan shoes. But I digress.
Anyway, I just wanted to make sure you guys heard it from me before it came in on the grapevine: there's a new recruit here in the Bat Cave. Through very little fault of our own, we here in the home office seem to have ended up with a new Batgirl on our hands. Actually, it's mostly Tim's fault. I'm sure he'll remember Stephanie Brown. (Note from Catwoman: Before your time, Cassie. That said, if he hasn't told you about her already, dump the untrustworthy little punk immediately. ^_^) Well, the other week she followed Lena home one night and we decided we had to keep her. Honestly, at that point it was either let her join the circus or shoot her, and you know how Alfred feels about blood on the carpets.
Unlike the previous management did to Tim, I'm not going to show up over there and tell Cass that her shtick's been copped and she needs to retire, because unlike the previous management I'm not the grumpiest old control freak in the galaxy. However, I figured I ought to warn you. I mean, you know how stuff goes in our world. I think the galaxy's big enough for two Batgirls, but next thing we know a case is going to bring Cass here or send Steph there and people are getting all confused.
Speaking of which, Cass, can you set Dick up with an account on Bativac Jr. if he hasn't already got one, and/or tell me his address? I've got an idea I want to run by him...
Got to wrap this up, the silent alarm just went off at Alhazred Pharma. I'm sure nothing terrifyingly ill-advised is up in their development labs.