The best part is that I don't even really need to write the rest of them. If you (the reader) are not familiar with the Team Fortress 2 shorts, the whole joke fails anyway; but if you are, then now that I've established the baseline, all I have to do is throw out bits like

LYNNE
(muttering to herself)
I think its mate saw me.

A red NEUROI PLASMA BEAM narrowly misses her head as she ducks.

LYNNE
Yes, yes it did.

or

SANYA
(puzzled)
What was noise?

YOSHIKA regards the MIYAFUJI ENGINE in her hand with bemusement for a moment, then gets an I-have-an-idea look on her face and casually flicks the remains of SANYA'S HEART off the electrodes.

YOSHIKA
The sound of progress, Sanya-chan.

or

MIO
I'm a grim bloody fable with an unhappy bloody end!

or

TRUDE
And that's why it's called a zoo!

and you can fill in the rest for yourselves. :)

(Particularly fond of Lynne as Sniper, I think. "Professionals have standards." :)

--G.
"I'm not a crazed cultist, Dad, I'm a witch. Well, the difference being one is a job and the other's mental sickness! Dad.... Dad. Put Mum on the phone."
-><-
Benjamin D. Hutchins, Co-Founder, Editor-in-Chief, & Forum Mod
Eyrie Productions, Unlimited http://www.eyrie-productions.com/
zgryphon at that email service Google has
Ceterum censeo Carthaginem esse delendam.