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Subject: "H2G2: GENOM LAWN"     Previous Topic | Next Topic
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Mephronmoderator
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Feb-02-17, 02:17 PM (EDT)
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"H2G2: GENOM LAWN"
 
   LAST EDITED ON Feb-02-17 AT 02:22 PM (EST) by Gryphon (admin)
 
[Don't mind me, I'm just fixing a typo that I think I introduced in the first place. --G.]

ARCHIVED ENTRY: This Guide entry is archived from a previous edition for historical purposes. The information presented in it may no longer be accurate.
original entry date 5.22.2405

sort:byplace
Federation >>>>
Core >>>
Co-Prosperity Sphere >>
Tomodachi >

subsort:bytopic
Planetary Features >>>
Unusual Locations >>
Nekomikoka >

GENOM LAWN

The GENOM LAWN (it's always in all upper case) is one of those places that make no sense. It's a perfectly square, perfectly flat two-acre lawn in the middle of Nekomikoka. There's no trees, no bushes, no walkways, it's just a big honking lawn. There's one little shed in one corner which contains a self-driving lawn mower that mows it once a week, and that's literally the only feature.

The reasons it exists is, basically, tax purposes. See, in 2340, GENOM was building a big HQ on that spot. And then for no reason anyone knows of, one night, it collapsed, just thump down in itself, whole building ended up in the basement. There's a story there was a fight on that spot right afterwards, but no one can confirm that (sadly).

After that night, for whatever reason, until Largo got the final shutdown (doo-doo-dooot dooot), GENOM pulled out of Tomodachi entirely. For some reason, though, they never sold the building site. Never did anything, it was like they forgot they owned it. Until they got the next tax bill... along with the eyesore penalties. Someone got the message and the place got covered over and landscaped about as minimally as you can get. Someone called it GENOM LAWN, and that's what it's called.

It's an okay place to crash if you need it, a good place to hang out on a sunny day, the cops are cool, and you can even put up a tent for a few days - but if you're there too long, someone will ask you move along. It'll probably be Larry, the lawnmower, who's pretty chill about that kind of thing. He just likes the lawn to look good.

This Guide entry was written by Rick "RoundUp" Morrelli, a professional traveller.

--
Geoff Depew - Darth Mephron
Haberdasher to Androids, Dark Lord of Sith Tech Support.
"And Remember! Google is your Friend!!"


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  Subject     Author     Message Date     ID  
H2G2: GENOM LAWN [View All] Mephronmoderator Feb-02-17 TOP
  RE: H2G2: GENOM LAWN Peter Eng Feb-02-17 1
     RE: H2G2: GENOM LAWN Gryphonadmin Feb-02-17 2
         RE: H2G2: GENOM LAWN Pasha Feb-02-17 3
         RE: H2G2: GENOM LAWN Kendra Kirai Feb-03-17 4
  RE: H2G2: GENOM LAWN zwol Feb-04-17 5
     RE: H2G2: GENOM LAWN Meridias Feb-04-17 6
         RE: H2G2: GENOM LAWN BobSchroeck Feb-04-17 7
             RE: H2G2: GENOM LAWN rwpikul Feb-05-17 8

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Peter Eng
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Feb-02-17, 02:34 PM (EDT)
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1. "RE: H2G2: GENOM LAWN"
In response to message #0
 
   >It'll probably be Larry, the lawnmower, who's pretty chill
>about that kind of thing. He just likes the lawn to look good.
>

Larry's pretty chill about most things. He'll ask people to move along if they're damaging the grass (rugby and turfball will get him out in a hurry), but outside of that, he's okay. Not a great conversationalist unless you're into lawn maintenance in a big way, though.

Peter Eng
--
Insert humorous comment here.


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Gryphonadmin
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Feb-02-17, 03:27 PM (EDT)
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2. "RE: H2G2: GENOM LAWN"
In response to message #1
 
   >Not a great
>conversationalist unless you're into lawn maintenance in a big way,
>though.

Well, at least he's a fairly sophisticated yard care droid. The old Nova Labs WILL-E series (a groundskeeping variant of their WALL-E sanitation droid) knew one thing and one thing only: mowing level grass areas with right-angle corners. Any task more complicated would flummox their tiny robobrains to the point where they would occasionally get violent, which is why you never see them around any more.

--G.
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Benjamin D. Hutchins, Co-Founder, Editor-in-Chief, & Forum Mod
Eyrie Productions, Unlimited http://www.eyrie-productions.com/
zgryphon at that email service Google has
Ceterum censeo Carthaginem esse delendam.


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Pasha
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Feb-02-17, 06:23 PM (EDT)
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3. "RE: H2G2: GENOM LAWN"
In response to message #2
 
   >>Not a great
>>conversationalist unless you're into lawn maintenance in a big way,
>>though.
>
>Well, at least he's a fairly sophisticated yard care droid. The old
>Nova Labs WILL-E series (a groundskeeping variant of their WALL-E
>sanitation droid) knew one thing and one thing only: mowing level
>grass areas with right-angle corners. Any task more complicated would
>flummox their tiny robobrains to the point where they would
>occasionally get violent, which is why you never see them around any
>more.

I'm now imagining a bot speaking WALL-E dialogue but with a Scots accent. And demanding the occasional greasing.

--
-Pasha
"Don't change the subject"
"Too slow, already did."


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Kendra Kirai
Member since May-22-16
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Feb-03-17, 03:37 AM (EDT)
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4. "RE: H2G2: GENOM LAWN"
In response to message #2
 
   Not gonna lie, I thought it was Larry Mann showing an extreme fondness for lawn care.


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zwol
Member since Feb-24-12
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Feb-04-17, 03:31 PM (EDT)
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5. "RE: H2G2: GENOM LAWN"
In response to message #0
 
   Now I'm wondering what happened to the site after Largo's death. His successors had no compulsion to ignore Tomodachi — would they have kept it as is? Turned it into a more thoroughly landscaped park? Dusted off the old plans and built an office building? I can see it going any of those ways...


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Meridias
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Feb-04-17, 05:24 PM (EDT)
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6. "RE: H2G2: GENOM LAWN"
In response to message #5
 
   If R-Type has any input on the subject, I can totally see him leaving it as is just as a tribute to (and remembering) where Largo got curb-stomped.

*********************
Rock Is Dead. Long Live Paper And Scissors.


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BobSchroeck
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Feb-04-17, 10:41 PM (EDT)
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7. "RE: H2G2: GENOM LAWN"
In response to message #6
 
   >If R-Type has any input on the subject, I can totally see him leaving
>it as is just as a tribute to (and remembering) where Largo got
>curb-stomped.

And besides, who would be cruel enough to retire Larry the Lawnmower?

-- Bob
-------------------
My race is pacifist and does not believe in war. We kill only out of personal spite.


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rwpikul
Member since Jun-22-03
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Feb-05-17, 09:26 AM (EDT)
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8. "RE: H2G2: GENOM LAWN"
In response to message #7
 
   >And besides, who would be cruel enough to retire Larry the Lawnmower?

I don't know, he might like being put out to pasture.

--
Chakat Firepaw - Inventor & Scientist (Mad)


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